Fast Lane - End of the Line
by Typhoon73
Summary: Sequel of Fast Lane. Jane's PVO 'They took everything from me. I do not fear for you are with me. All those who defied me, shall be ashamed, and disgraced. Those who wage war against me, shall perish. I will find strength, find guidance. And I will triumph!
1. Chapter 1

**Hey guys. So here's the start of the sequel of Fast Lane. I know it's a bit short but it's just at the start. I hope you will like it. Enjoy.**

 **T73.**

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My name is Jane Rizzoli. I am thirty-three years old and born and raised in Boston, Massachusetts. That's also were I am currently living and working.  
I am a Homicide Detective and work with my friends and colleagues Detective Barry Frost and Sergeant Detective Vince Korsak on difficult murder cases.  
Almost a year ago a new member joined our team. Dr. Maura Isles, Chief Medical Examiner of the commonwealth Massachusetts.  
She's smart and a stickler for details.  
An real enrichment for our team.  
And she's my wife.  
I met her by an accident as running in the morning. We bumped into each other and from the very first second we had a special connection. The problem was that I was about to go undercover. That was why I couldn't tell her at the beginning who I really am.  
A rough start for our relationship, but we made it.  
We got married one and a half months ago. It was a beautiful wedding. And since one and a half months we are in San Pedro in Belize. Sadly today's our last day here.  
Maura lies fast asleep on her belly. She where's nothing but a white sheet over her middle.  
I let my fingertips brush over her sun-kissed skin. I lip my lips follow my fingers and she moves a little, signing content and smiling. I skid up and kiss her bare shoulder.  
The smile in her lips grows wider before she opens her hazel eyes.  
I kiss her at her neck and she moans a little. Not because of arousal but because of contentedness. "Hi," she mumbles.  
I kiss her shoulder again and inhale her smell that is just her. I let my free hand roam over her back. "Hi," I whisper back.  
She waggles a little with her butt and closes her eyes again. "What time is it?"  
I brush her skin with my lips and close my eyes too. "Too late to be still in bed and too soon to go back to Boston."  
She starts to roll her hips a little.  
I think since we got married our sex drive got intense. We barely can keep our hands to ourselves.  
"Jane, we have to stop." she whispers.  
I snicker amused. "I barely have started."  
Maura turns on her back and I raise an eyebrow at that sight. Erected nipples are screaming for my attention.  
I whimper as she places her index finger under my chin and forces me to look up into her eyes.  
"Up here are my eyes, Jane" she says with a small smile.  
"I know," I reply. "And I love your eyes." I drop my eyes back to her breasts. "But I also love these two."  
She runs her hands through my messy hair. "I know. And I love that you love them, but my whole body is sore. We barely managed to leave this bed since we are here. And now I need a little break."  
I sigh and lean my head down to kiss her gently. I know that she is more than right but it's just so hard to keep my hands all by myself. I break the kiss when oxygen is necessary and frown. "Do we really have to go back to Boston?"  
She smiles softly at me and takes a deep breath. "I am afraid that we have to. In two days you and I have to be back at work."  
I turn up my nose. "We could accept a job offer here. Me a Detective of the San Pedro Police, solving murders while I slurp a cocktail and you could perform autopsies in a super sexy scrub. For example you could wear ... a bikini top and hot pants."  
Maura chuckles and wraps her arms around my neck. "You have an pervert fantasy."  
I smirk and lean my head down once more. "And in each of them you are the star."  
She let her hand wander over my bare back and smirks mischievously. "I hope so."  
I suppress a growl and have to regulate my breathing. But as soon as I look into her face my efforts are in vain. I still can't believe that someone like Maura has chosen someone like me. That she decided that she want to spend the rest of her life with me. Before we met, I was broken. I was unsettled and lonely. I didn't believe that I could feel whole again. But Maura was able to do something that none of my previous lovers were able to do. She makes me feel like a completely new human being.  
I run my thumb over her cheekbones and furrow my eyebrows. "I love you. You know that, don't you?"  
She furrows her eyebrows too and cups my face with both of her hands. "Of course I know that, Jane. And I love you. But as much as I love you ... I really have to use the bathroom now."  
I grunt and roll onto my back.  
She smiles broadly and kisses my lips before she gets out of the bed.  
I smile as well and sigh deeply as I follow her with my eyes.  
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I'm standing in the hallway on the third floor and can hear the chaos already. It's an chaos that I'm living for, a chaos others pay a high price for. I never had an other goal than to become a Detective. A Homicide Detective, to be more precise.  
That's what I am since a couple of years. I am adamant, accurate and final. I am steadfast in my job. I am a cop with heart and soul. This is who I am, this is what I'm living for.  
I close my eyes and enjoy the smell of old sweat and probably older coffee. I enjoy the curses of the suspects and the crackles in the radios of the patrolmen.  
Now I am home, now I am where I should be.  
I smile to myself and enter the bullpen of my department.  
Frost spots me first and jumps up to his feet. "Hey," he exclaims. "Look at who's finally here."  
Korsak twists around and almost spills his coffee. "Jane!"  
I smile broadly at the two men. God, how much I missed them. "Hey, guys."  
Korsak places his mug on his desk and hugs me tightly. He almost breaks my ribs. "It's good to see you."  
I laugh and choke for air. "It's good to see you too." I croak. Jesus, he's almost worse than Ma.  
Frost smiles broadly and hugs me as well. "Welcome back, Jane."  
I match his smile and pat his back. "Thanks," I whisper.  
I am dressed in a grey suit and a white dress shirt. I feel stronger than usual because of the golden badge on the right of my belt and the weight of my Glock on the left of my belt. I glance at my desk and smile because it's empty.  
"That's our wedding gift to you," Korsak states.  
I look at him and grin. "That you cleaned up my desk?"  
Frost rolls his eyes and sits back down on his chair. "Your welcome."  
I chuckle and put my jacket over the back of my chair before I sit down on it. "Okay, what do we have for today?"  
Korsak holds up an file. "It's a slow day. We have nothing to do than our paper work."  
I stare at my empty desk and frown. "Was murder on honeymoon too?" Frost nods his head. "Yes. By the way, you look well rested. And you almost my skin color."  
I chuckle again. "Not even close."  
He smirks and looks back at his desk.  
Korsak shakes amused his head. "No, it wasn't on vacation. We catched a few cases but it wasn't something extraordinary. The really tricky cases just waited for you to come back."  
"If this is true," I reply as I log in into my computer. "I go straight back to San Pedro and live there for the rest of my life."  
Korsak chuckles. "How was your honeymoon?" he asks as he sips his coffee.  
I back in my chair and nod my head. "Well, it was relaxing. Exactly what Maura and I needed after this god damn undercover operation. I wanted to stay in San Pedro but Maura had the opinion that we need to go back to work again."  
Frost grunts as he stifles a laugh.  
I furl my eyebrows and glare at him. I open my mouth to ask him what's wrong with him as suddenly hell breaks loose.  
Several Detectives and patrolmen run out of the bullpen.  
Korsak furls his eyebrows and glances questioningly at us.  
I furl my eyebrows as well and am about to get up.  
"Rizzoli," Cavanaugh says with an very serious face as he comes into the bullpen. "Follow me." he commands. "And welcome back."  
Yeah, welcome back, my ass. I get up from the chair and follow my Lieutenant into his office. What the ... I am not long enough in the building that I could have something wrong or stupid.  
Frost and Korsak follow us without being asked.  
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I arrive with Korsak and Frost in Korsak's unmarked car at a apartment building. This is a great Welcome back gift. A cop killing right at my first day back.  
I already have an headache that starts in the back of my head and I don't need overeager cops on the crime scene who rather contaminate the crime scene than helping us. But that's exactly the current situation. Too many cops at one crime scene. I mean, I can understand them all. We all want to help as soon as one of us got killed. Either in the line of fire or on their way home. It's like someone killed one of our sisters or brothers. And absolutely no one should mess with the family of a cop.  
I glance at Korsak and he seems to understand what I am trying to say.  
He separates from us and talks to a few of officers.  
I take a deep breath and put on a pair of gloves. I glance over my shoulder and smile as I see Maura in her light blue dress coming towards to us.  
"Hey, Doc. " I greet her in my normal manner.  
A smile plays around her lips. "Hello. Where is Korsak?"  
Frost chuckles as he sees my puzzled face.  
My jaw hits the ground and I furrow my eyebrows. "Really?"  
She tries to hide her amused smile, in vain.  
I shake my head with a small smile and look up at the building. I have absolutely no idea who lives here and who got murdered. The only thing that Cavanaugh has told us is that the victim was one of us.  
"Do we know who the victim is," Maura asks. Cavanaugh probably has talked to her too.  
Frost and I shake our heads.  
She takes a deep breath and put on a pair of gloves.  
I wish I could take a look behind her forehead to see what she is thinking. Perhaps the same than us.  
 _Please don't let it be someone we know_.

We enter the building and the entrance hall is filled with horrified cops.  
Suddenly, everyone's eyes are on the three of us.  
I clench my teeth and mumble several excuses as my shoulder bump in someone else's as I climb the stairs up to the first floor.  
"Are you okay?" my wife whispers.  
I have put on my professional mask and nod my head. In my outside I play it cool, but on the inside of me is a war raging. I slow my steps as soon as I see Eric Parr standing at the wide opened apartment door. He's talking to another Detective.  
As soon as our eyes meet, he stops talking.  
I frown slightly and enter the said apartment. It's an apartment like mine was before I met Maura. Everything in here screams _I am single and I don't mind_.

A open beer stands on the kitchen counter, it's barely touched.  
Well, if the victim hadn't had a serious drinking problem, I doubt that he or she will died this morning. But what is the line of a certain Doctor? _Jane, I can't confirm that_ _until I have performed_ _the autopsy_. I already roll my eyes even though not a single is exchanged since we're in this apartment.

I discover an wallet near the beer bottle. It's open.  
I check the pockets of it and frown. "It wasn't a robbery. The money's still in the wallet. Looks like five hundred bucks in there. A lot of cash for a cop." I say out loud. I am about to check the victim's ID.  
"Jane," Frost calls out.  
I frown and follow the source of his voice. I enter the bedroom and walk to the walk-in closet. "What is it?"  
He looks over his shoulder and frowns deeply. "Do you and Maura also own a safe in your closet?"  
I furl my eyebrows. I am a little confused about his question. "Should I be worried now?"  
He stands up and takes a deep breath. "Well, I do own a safe too."  
"Congrats." I reply. I am still confused.  
He doesn't smile or laugh. "But the only things I store in it are the family jewels that I've inherited from my grandfather, my wallet and my gun. But not something like that."  
The frown on my forehead deepens with every second. I don't want to know what he stores in his damn safe. We are here to investigate a murder of a cop. "Yeah, that sounds similar to the contents of our safe. But why are we talking about that?"  
He steps aside and points at the open safe. "Because, no matter how often I open the door of my safe, I never find stuff like that in it."  
As soon as I see the contents in this safe my jaw hits the floor an I almost let the wallet slip out of my hands. "Holy shit," I whisper and step closer. I can see three white rectangled packages sealed in foil and a couple wad of cash. "Even in my safe isn't stuff like that. I thought we're here because of a dead cop and not because of a drug dealer."  
"Is there a difference? Dead is dead." Frost states.  
I glance at him and frown. "Of course there's no difference. It's just ... I hate black sheeps in our own row." I finally check the victim's ID. "Lisa Flanagan." I pause and stare ahead of me. I furl my eyebrows. "Lisa Flanagan. The name sounds familiar."  
He nods his head in agreement.  
"It should, Detective Rizzoli." Parr says as he joins us.  
I glance at him with an puzzled expression.  
"Detective Lisa Flanagan was a member if DCU during your little undercover operation. She was in the sight of Internal Affairs just like John Dillinger. She was one of my prime suspects."  
I exhale annoyed through my mouth and I clench my teeth.  
Great.


	2. Chapter 2

**Hi guys, I have a new update. And thank you for reading, following and telling me your opinion. Thank you a lot. So, I hope you also like this chapter. I also can tell you that some old characters will show up again. Anyway, enjoy.**

 **T73.**

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I have bought two cups of coffee in the Café before I went down into the morgue. This time it's no easy way. Lisa Flanagan is still one of us. Correction, was one of us. Dirty or not. I am just happy that Ma has a day off. I am not in the mood for her interrogation.  
I take a deep breath and walk through the double door to the autopsy room.  
Maura is still at work. Her hands are buried deeply in Lisa's chest. "Should Korsak come down instead of me?"  
She chuckles but doesn't look at me. "I was just wondering that he wasn't with you at the crime scene."  
I smile and sit down on a empty autopsy table. "You just won't admit that you're attracted to him."  
She glances over her shoulder at me and smiles broadly.  
I grin and shake my head. "Okay, back to work. My fist question. There was an open bottle of beer on the kitchen counter this morning."  
"That was an declaration and not a question." she replies.  
I roll my eyes. "Did she have a drinking problem?"  
She sighs and straightens up. "No. There are no signs of a regular alcohol abuse. Her whole body is in a good condition. Lisa Flanagan didn't smoke and the blood alcohol analysis will show if and how much she has drank."  
I sigh heavily. "So does the drug screen. Anyway, what's the cause of death?"  
Maura turns to me and frowns. "The shoot to her chest. It was fatal. Even with medical care she wouldn't have survived."  
I close my eyes and rub my temples with the fingers of my left hand and groan.  
Maura says nothing until I open my eyes again. "The bullet also pierced her right hand."  
I clench my teeth. "Like she had raised her hand to stop the person from shooting."  
She nods her head agree.  
I close my eyes again and frown.  
She puts off her gloves and frowns too. "Who is she?"  
"I guess a warning." I answer. I can feel that this annoying darkness swallows me already. It's not the darkness of my job, it's the darkness that I brought myself into my life. That one that was expelled with Maura's arrival in my life. I can feel her eyes on me but they don't warm me right now. And she knows me too well and keeps her distance.  
But I want her closeness now and sigh heavily.  
She takes two big steps and wraps her arms around my middle. "I will find you in the gym." she whispers.  
I close my eyes and am happy that I have her in my god damn life. I take a deep breath and nod my head before I leave the morgue.  
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I walk in my sports gear into the gym and spot Frost as he pushes a weight. I walk over to the rack where the other weights are and grab two of them.  
He glances at me and frowns. "You're looking as stressed as I feel like."  
"And you're looking like you're having the same thought than I have," I reply before I start my exercise.  
He sits up on the bench and looks around to make sure that no one can hear us. "Korsak already informs Cavanaugh and Parr."  
I pause for a moment and furl my eyebrows. "As far as I know Flanagan and Dillinger worked together for a couple of years. I wouldn't be surprised when she got her hands dirty too."  
He dries his face with his towel. "You think that Dillinger gone too far and her death is a warning for him?"  
I continue my exercise and sigh. "Maybe they pissed off the wrong mobster. Or the wrong drug lord. I mean Dillinger is playing with fire and I think it's not clear to him."  
"Then he's really an idiot." he says and lies back on the bench. "He really can't think that the mob bosses and drug lords simply give up their power so he can takeover."  
I briefly raise my eyebrows and smile a little. I know that some cops are not the brightest candle on the cake or that they are naive. Bit no one can be that stupid or naive to think that a hostile takeover takes place without bloodshed. Even Frost knows that. Hell, even my Ma knows it. "Maybe it's time to talk to Dillinger."  
"Seriously?" Frost asks.  
I blink a few times. "What?"  
"You want to talk to John Dillinger already?"  
"Did I say that out loud?"  
He chuckles amused. "Sometimes you are weird."  
I smile and shrug my shoulders. "I just was lost in my thoughts. And I am not sorry for that."  
He chuckles again and exhales slowly through his mouth. "Do you think this is the beginning of a vendetta?"  
I think about his question and frown deeply. "I hope not. Because if it is the beginning of an vendetta than we have to expect the hell on earth. Because then greed tears its ugly face."  
"You mean then hell breaks loose." he states and sits up again.  
I stop my own exercise and exhale slowly through my nose. "You can bet."  
Frankie enters the gym and spots us. He walks over to us and frowns. "Why are you making such faces?"  
I glance at Frost and he grins. I look up at my brother and frown. "We make those faces because you're interrupting a conversation of adults."  
He rolls his eyes and punches my shoulder. "Pretty funny. Why are you hiding here?"  
"Why are you here at all though it's your day off." Frost replies.  
I raise an eyebrow and smirk.  
Frankie frowns deeply. "Uh ... the work out sessions here are cheaper."  
Frost chuckles and shakes his head.  
I scoff and slap my brother's arm. That could have been an answer of me.  
He drops his back to the ground. "Did you catch an interesting case today?"  
I take a deep breath. "Lisa Flanagan got killed."  
He puts on his boxing gloves and stares at me. "Why does the name sound familiar to me?"  
I glance at my partner. "She was one of us."  
He pauses for a second. "Damn. Is she tall, blonde and cute? And in my age?"  
"Yeah," Frost answers. "And now she's pretty dead."  
Frankie stretches his muscles and tendons. "I think I went on a date with her."  
My amuses face disappears and I place the weights back on the rack. "You went on a date with Lisa Flanagan?"  
He starts to punch the punching bag. "Yeah. Why? Is she also one of your exes?"  
I walk over to him and hold the bag in place.  
Frost takes a drinking bottle from his bag.  
"Frankie, this isn't funny. This is pretty serious." I say.  
He doesn't stop his work out. "Why? Did she kill someone?"  
I frown deeply. "Maybe."  
He stops and looks at me. But then he starts to laugh. "You almost got me."  
I look in disbelief at him and point at my face. "Does my face say that I am fooling you?"  
Frost walks over to us. "We found a safe in her closet. In it was forty thousand bucks and drugs, Frankie. If you would have been seen with her than it could look bad for you. People could think that you knew about her illegal activities."  
Frankie furls his eyebrows. "I only knew about ..." he glances at me and hesitates. "about her other activities."  
I gag and shudder. "Gosh, I want to cut out my inner eyes. I ... I don't want those pictures in my head. Why ... why are you doing this to me, Frankie?"  
My brother shrugs his shoulders. "I didn't say anything in detail."  
I close my eyes and take a deep breath. "Did she act kinda weird?"  
"Not in my presence," he says. "We didn't talk a lot, though."  
I close my eyes again and place my hand on my belly before I walk towards the women's locker room. "I gotta go before I am throwing up. Frost, you think that you can talk to my stupid brother."  
Frankie chuckles amused.  
"Yeah," Frost agrees and chuckles too.  
I roll my eyes and gag once more. Jeeze, guys and their bedroom stories. It's like they're comparing their war wounds. I mean hell, I just enjoy those things and don't talk about them.  
I pull my shirt over my head and go for the shower stalls.  
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I enter the bullpen and slow my steps as soon as I see a brown paper bag and a cup of coffee, or what I think it's coffee, on my desk. Either my Ma was here or Maura.  
Korsak looks up from a file and frowns.  
I go to my desk and take the cup in my hand. I sip the hot liquid and have to smile. "I love this woman even more."  
"Your mother?" he asks.  
"No," I reply and furl my eyebrows. "Yes, her too. But this comes from Maura. I only can imagine how hard it must have been for her to put sugar in the coffee instead of her beloved Stevia thing. Not to mention the cream."  
He chuckles amused.  
I grin and take a look in the paper bag. My grin grows wider as I see a bag of chips and smell salami. "Hell, I love my girlfriend."  
"Wife." Korsak corrects me.  
I look at him and frown. "Huh?"  
He smiles and points at his left empty ring finger.  
I glance at my own finger and see my wedding band. My frown deepens. "I'm still not used to call Maura my wife and she didn't heard it when I called her my girlfriend." I lower my eyebrows and look around. "Or at least I hope so."  
He laughs heartily and gets up from his chair. "I can understand you, Jane. Old habits die hard."  
I open the bag of chips and frown. "What are we reading?"  
He pins Lisa's picture on the glass board. "Flanagan's personnel file. It's a really good novel, though."  
I chew on the potato chip and my frown deepens. "Tell me more."  
"Her days were numbered." he says and hands me the file. "She was definitely dirty. Important evidence never arrived in the evidence room as soon as she had her shift. Confiscated guns re-appeared on the streets. Drug lords got informed about the next hit. Until Dillinger and Flanagan worked hand in hand."  
"He promised her a bigger career." I say while I chew on the chips. "She was once positive for cocaine?"  
He nods his head.  
I sigh heavily and clench my teeth. "God damn it."  
"But we can't connect Dillinger and her activities."  
"I need to talk to her."  
"Jane ..." he says warningly.  
I grab a dead phone from a drawer of my desk.  
Korsak stands up. "Jane, **stop**!"

I glare at him as I turn it on and type a message. "I need a connection and I need answers. And she is the only reliable source. Trust me, Vince."  
He opens his mouth and sits down again before he closes it again.  
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I have changed into a jeans and a white tank top before I made the ride to the parking lot of the Fenway park on my bike. I know that Maura owns a pretty nice Mercedes AMG but I never drove it. Especially not without her permission, and since CJ owns my Mazda I have no other choice then to use my Triumph when I meet with her.  
I chew on the nail of my thumb and frown as I hear a familiar engine roaring.  
My ... the Mazda speeds on the parking lot and drifts to an halt.  
I roll my eyes and huff. Yeah, I know that the car is capable of doing that. And yes, I want it back.  
CJ Pérez gets out of the car and smiles at me. She walks up to me and frowns. "Congrats."  
"Thanks," I reply and smile a little. "Well, how are you doing?"  
"Pretty well," she answers and smiles broadly. "Ever since we met you turned my life upside down."  
I cross my arms over my chest and frown. "I hope in a good way."  
"Yeah. Yeah, in a good way. Since you put the case on a break, I took distance from the illegal racing scene. And I am still alive."  
I have to smile at her enthusiasm and raise briefly my eyebrows. "So, what are you doing for a living now?"  
She takes a deep breath. "I opened my own car repair shop."  
I pull the corners of my mouth downward. "Nice. Let me guess. Near the beach."  
She chuckles amused. "You know me too good." suddenly she turns serious again. "But I guess that we're not here to exchange our stories how our lives went since we met the last time."  
I take a deep breath and fish an photo out of the back pocket of my jeans. It shows Lisa Flanagan. I walk over to CJ and hand it to her. "Do you know her?"  
She studies the photo for a moment. "It's possible that I've seen her a few times at some races. Who's that?"  
I cross my arms over my chest again. "Her name is Lisa Flanagan. She worked for the drug unit."  
"Was she undercover too?" she asks.  
I shake slightly my head. "No." I sigh. "No, we have to assume that she was dirty. Does the name John Dillinger ring a bell?"  
CJ thinks short and frowns. "I am not quite sure. Are all those people dead because of him? Is my brother dead because of him?"  
I run my thumb over my left eyebrow and frown slightly. "We don't know yet. But we can't rule that out. We think that there is a connection, though."  
"Then arrest him." she almost shouts. "Why don't you go and arrest him?"  
I hold my hands up to calm her down. "We still try to get it all together. And once we have everything we need, then we can bring this fucker down."  
She closes her eyes and swallows hard.  
I can see that she is trying to compose herself again. An I cam see that it takes her a hell of will power. I sigh again and place an hand on her shoulder. "If he is responsible for Marco's death then he'll pay for it."  
A smile plays on her lips.  
I have to smile a little too. "What?"  
"You're probably the only cop who remembers the victim's name after the case is closed."  
I smirk and shake my head. "Don't underestimate us cops, CJ."  
"I never will." she smiles.  
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I come home and long for an ice-cold beer. I roll my eyes as I find the front door unlocked. My wife is still so naive even though we see every day what humans are capable to do to each other. I enter the house and lock the door behind me. The first floor is illuminated but no one is down here so I guess that Maura is up in her study or getting ready for bed.  
I sigh and walk to the fridge to get my desired beer. I open the bottle and take a swig. Then I scuff up the stairs and into our bedroom. I put the open bottle on my bedside table and place my gun and my badge in the top drawer. I know that Maura doesn't like it but my argument that I feel safer when I have my gun within my reach in the case that I need it. And that I know that it's there calms me and that I want to keep her safe worked better than her arguments for a gun safe. **But** ... we do own one for her sanity.

I pull my shirt over my head and step out of my jeans before I put on a black shorts and one of my grey BPD shirts.  
"Jane?" comes Maura's voice from the en-suite bathroom.  
I frown, grab my beer from the bedside table and walk to the bathroom door. I enter the room and smile a little when I see her sitting in the filled bath tub, covered by bath foam. Her hair is up and revealing her tempting neck.  
I sit down on the edge of the tub and lean my head down to kiss her lips.  
Maura smiles sweetly up at me. "Hi."  
I smile back at her and run a hand over her cheek. "Hey." I reply. She looks absolutely amazing, even with no clothes or make-up. That's exactly why I am worried if the house isn't locked when she is alone. She's an beautiful woman who is clueless and alone in a big house while she's taking a bath. Some maniac could come in and rape her or ... or even worse. Rape and kill her.  
Maura runs her wet hand over my forehead. "What's wrong?"  
I sigh. "You really should start to lock the front door when you're alone."  
"I'm a big girl, Jane." she replies and sips her wine.  
I exhale through my mouth. "I know, Maura. But even when you're a big girl, you're still defenseless if a wacko comes in here and can do awful things to you."  
"You're sweet when you're worried." she says with a smile.  
I frown deeply. "You're sweet when you're alive."  
She grasps my arms and smiles. "All right. I promise you betterment."  
"I mean it." I say seriously.  
"My too." she says and furrows her eyebrows. "Now, would you please get out of your clothes and into this tub?"  
I look down at me and furl my eyebrows. "But ... I ... just changed into these clothes."  
She huffs and leans back. "Fine, then go to bed and I'll enjoy the bath all by myself."  
I don't need to think twice and pull my shirt over my head and step out of my shorts.  
Maura skids forward so I can sit down behind her.  
I don't know anymore when we started doing this but I don't mind it a bit. I sit down in the warm water and groan as it surrounds us.  
She sits back and smiles over her shoulder at me as I place my hands on her thighs. "I missed you today." she whispers.  
I place a kiss in her nape. "But you've seen me today.  
She takes a deep breath. "But I still misses you, Jane."  
I wrap my arms around her middle and pull her closer to me. "I missed you too."


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey guys, thank you so much for reading and following. It means much to me. And I have an update again. I hope that you like this chapter. And of course you are again welcome to tell me what you think. Enjoy.**

 **T73.**

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We didn't bother to use towels or even to get dressed after we left the tub.  
I just grabbed her at the waist and carried her into our bedroom.  
Maura gasps as soon as her back hits the mattress of our bed.  
"See," I say as I hover over her. "There's no problem to haul you into bed."  
She bites her bottom lip as she tries to control her breathing. Running her hands over my bare back.  
I kiss her along the jawline and groan as she drags her nails over my skin. I know that she wants it and I want it too. I mean there was never a woman in my life that I wanted so much than her.  
"You're so beautiful." I mumble against her ear and she arches her back.  
"Jane." she whispers low.  
Just hearing my name out of her mouth that way is driving me completely nuts. I start to believe that this will ever change. I kiss her at her neck and my hands wander over her spread legs. I can feel the heat that is coming from her core. But I stop my actions when I feel her shaking underneath me. What the hell? I barely started. I look at her and see thick tears rolling down her cheeks. At once, all sexual tension leaves my body.  
These are no tears of joy or sexual arousal. These are tears of something else. What happened? Have I said or done something wrong? That wasn't my intention, though. I hover over my crying wife again and scrutinize her face. "Hey," I whisper and frown deeply. "what's wrong, Maura?"  
She opens her eyes and shakes her head. "I ..." she whispers. "I don't know. I mean yes, I know what's bothering me. And I knew that this day will be coming one day."  
I search her face with my eyes. "What coming?"  
"Me examining a dead cop." she replies.  
My heart sinks. I mean I knew that this day will be coming too, but ai never thought that it would get to her that much. No matter if Flanagan was dirty, but she was still a cop. But I hate to investigate a dirty cop's murder. I hate that some cops are corrupt at all.  
Either you serve and protect the citizens of a town or you leave it at all. But another feeling crawls underneath my skin as I see those troubled hazel eyes. I know that Maura is afraid that I really end up on one of her tables. Well, Korsak once said it, I am like a dog with a bone. I never let go. Especially in a cop killing, dirty or not. I furrow my eyebrows and run my left thumb over her cheek. "I'm not going anywhere, Maura."  
She closes her eyes and sniffles. It's uncharacteristical for her I don't comment that. "I know. I know that, Jane. And I know that it is foolish. Everybody has to leave one day. But when I really saw a dead cop on one of my tables this permanent danger became real."  
I take a deep breath. "Was it your first time?" I ask and frown. The question just sounded so wrong. "Was it your first dead cop on your table?"  
She sighs again and closes her eyes. "Yes."  
I open and shut my mouth with a frown. I mean, yeah, we'd married pretty fast but how can I not know that? What kind of wife am I if I not know that. Okay, this topic never came up. I mean her fear is not irrational, every day dies somewhere a cop and we can't stop it ... All right, Jane. Just stop right now. Why did she never told me that she never had an dead cop on her table. Was that why her relationships with those cops didn't worked out? Why am I thinking about them now? Jeez, am I married to her or them? I did hit the jackpot. I lower my head and kiss her as gently as possible. Not demanding. "I won't go anywhere."  
She puts an hand in my neck and keeps me in place and leans her head against mine. "You can't promise that."  
I will not lie to her and shake my head. "No." I whisper. "But I can promise you that I will do anything to stay alive. And stay with you because I love you. And I will do anything to keep you and our family safe."  
She takes a deep breath and wipes her tears away. "I just don't want to lose you, Jane. I know that I couldn't stand it if you one day would lie on one of ..."  
"Of your tables." I finish her sentence as she trails off.  
That brings fresh tears to her eyes and she nods her head.  
I kiss her once again. Just a quick peck. "It won't happen, Maura. I could never leave you. Therefore I love you too much. Let me show you how much I love you." I say as I kiss her along her neck. I shudder a little as her breathing elevates and when she whimpers.  
I let my left hand wander down her body and have to fight the urge to shut my eyes as her hands slide down to the small of my back. I hold her gaze as my hand reaches its destination.  
A low moan escapes from her clit when my thumb circles the bundle of nerves in slow motion.  
I kiss her beneath her ear and stifle a groan.  
"Jane," Maura breathes as she wraps her legs around my thighs.  
"I love you so much." I whisper in the same time as I slip two fingers inside of her.  
She immediately arches her back and pulls me in deeper.  
I nudge the side of her head with my nose and she looks at me while I slip in and out of her with a slow pace.  
She opens her eyes again.  
I wouldn't mind if I die right here and right now. I ask myself if there ever will be a day when I am not thinking that she is **not** beautiful. I close the distance of our mouths and kiss her deeply. It's a slow kiss just like our pace itself. Our tongues don't fight for dominance. They never do.  
Tonight our two bodies are just one.  
There are sometimes days where we only want to have a good fuck to release pressure. But then there are also days when we need to feel the connection that we have. Physically and mentally.  
On those days the sex is slow and sweet and completely fulfilling.  
And tonight is one of those days.  
Maura's breath hitches and she arches her back.  
I curl my fingers as I slowly slip out of her.  
Her eyes falls shut and her hands wander up my back and she drags her nails over my skin.  
I close my own eyes and can't keep my own eyes open. I don't suppress the deep moan as her hands reach the back of my neck.  
I roll my hips with the next thrust and I groan when she meets me half way.  
She gasps as she does it again.  
She moans unashamed into my ear and her walls clench tightly around my fingers.  
I drag my eyes open. She has her mouth wide open and her back lifts off the mattress.  
I swear to God, seeing her coming completely undone will always throw me over the edge. I moan lout and don't move an inch as she rides wave after wave of pleasure.  
I collapse onto her and pull my fingers carefully put of her. I nestle my nose in her nape.  
She whimpers and let her hands wandering over my back like she can't believe that I am real.  
Normally I am the one who is asking myself if I am still dreaming.  
"I love you, Maura. "I whisper.  
She runs her hands over my neck. "I love you too, Jane." she whispers back. "So much."  
I exhale through my nose and kiss her bare shoulder.  
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After I have woken up I've gone into the bathroom and have taken a shower before I brushed my teeth and got dressed in an red dress shirt an a black suit. I put my gun on my belt and glance at my golden badge. It's hard for me to put the black ribbon around it. But it's a sign of sympathy for the fallen comrade. But it makes me sick that exactly this comrade was a dirty one. I sigh heavily and put the badge on my belt too. I grab my jacket from its hanger and leave the bedroom. I walk down the stairs and get welcomed by the smell of freshly brewed coffee and bacon. I frown in confusion. Since when do we own real bacon? And since when am I allowed to eat it? I mean I get it to eat every leap year since I know my wife ... **or** when my mother invaded our kitchen. I groan at the thought of that possibility. I really love my mother but ever since we came back from our honeymoon she is like a leech. I stop dead in my track when I see no one else but my wife in the kitchen, my mother is nowhere to be seen. I frown but smile. "Is there a special occasion because I get fresh coffee **and** bacon?"

Maura smiles and points at my waiting place. "Can't I make you a decent breakfast with no reason? And you get fresh coffee every morning since we are together."  
I walk over to her and give her with a smile a kiss. "That's true. But bacon? Don't tell me that you're pregnant."  
"Fine," she says and pretends to throw it all into the garbage can.  
I glare at her but can't hide the smile that plays around my lips. She became really good at that game but then she give in and puts the slices of bacon on my plate.  
I smirk and sit down on my high chit. "Why do I deserve this and when did you go to the grocery?"  
"You deserve it because I love you. And I came back home thirty minutes ago." she replies as she places some scrambled eggs on the plate too.  
"So tomorrow morning you will love me a little less?" I ask with a frown.  
She furls her eyebrows as she pours me a cup of coffee. "Why would I love you less?"  
I shrug my shoulders and shove a fork full of eggs in my mouth. "Because I am sure that tomorrow you will force me to eat this disgusting muesli again."  
Maura rolls her eyes and chuckles. "You never complained about the muesli."  
"I suffer in silence," I reply and smirk as she laughs.  
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My good mood has changed into my professional one as soon as we enter the BPD building. I can ser that Korsak is looking at me with a worried gaze when we come into the entrance hall and frown.  
Maura touches my arm and frowns deeply.  
He comes up to us and smiles politely at her. "Hey, Doc."  
I know that he only calls her that in here. And I also know that he's doing it because he always wanted to.  
Anyway, business is business. And so on and so on. Bla bla bla.  
It doesn't matter to me right now. Right now I want to know why he has this odd expression. "What's wrong, Vince?"  
He takes a deep breath. "We tried to have a chat with Dillinger. But Internal Affairs interfered."  
I stare at him like he told me that I am no longer working here. "Why?"  
"They said that it would blow their running investigation."  
"This can't be true." I growl and start my way towards the elevator. "Are those idiot aware of the fact that they are impeding a running investigation of a cop killing?" I almost shout.  
He follows me with Maura hot on my heels. "I told them so."  
I punch the button of the elevator with my thumb and anger bubbles up to the surface. "But they won't cooperate? Are they nuts?"  
"Jane," Maura says calmly. "where are you going?"  
"I go and knock some sense into those knuckleheads." I growl low and look up at the display.  
She exchanges worried glances with Korsak but doesn't say anything.  
They both know better than trying to talk me out of my plan.  
The elevator opens its doors and we enter the car.  
The ride itself is settled into silence.  
My facial muscles twitch and I look to my right as Maura gives my hand a little squeeze. Normally that little gesture would bring a smile to my lips but not today, not now. Now I am really pissed off.  
The elevator door opens again at the fifth floor and I emerge from it immediately. I stomp down the hallway and directly in the direction of Eric Parr's desk.  
He sits at it and holds the receiver of his desk phone to his ear.  
I end the call by pushing down the cradle with my index finger.  
"That was an important call, Rizzoli." he says as he looks up.  
"It has to wait," I reply harshly and lower my eyebrows. "Would you please explain to me why Internal Affairs impedes our murder investigation?"  
He leans back in his chair and takes a deep breath. "Well, in a nutshell? The investigation of Internal Affairs has priority."  
My eyebrows shoot up high. Did I just heard right? The crappy investigation of Internal Affairs has priority? What the hell is he thinking who he is? "Are you kidding me?" I say louder. "Are you really believing the ... crap that is coming out of your mouth? Since when is a internal investigation of an dirty cop more important than the murder of this said cop?"  
"Since the day that we can bring down a hell lot of dirty cops who are probably working for Dillinger. And if he doesn't know that we keep an eye on him we have pretty good chances. When he starts to think that he is an potential suspect of an murder investigation, I am pretty sure that he will stop his activities."  
I stare him down and point into the direction of the elevator. "We have an dead cop down in the morgue who probably got killed by her good friend John Dillinger." I say louder.  
"You have no evidence to prove that, Rizzoli." Parr replies as loud as me.  
"Yeah," I laugh bitterly. "because you and your department are impeding our investigation. We just want to have a talk with your ... _prime suspect_. Do you really think that we are that stupid and telling him that there is a investigation going on because of him?"  
He gets up to his feet and points at me. "If you're talking to him I put you on charges."  
I glare at him and clench my fists. I really would love to smash his damn face in.  
Korsak sighs heavily. "Come on, Jane. It's worthless."  
I wince when I feel a hand on my back.  
"Jane, let's go." Maura says. "We can't do anything up here."  
I take a deep breath before I turn to leave.  
"Yeah, Rizzoli." Parr says. "Listen to your wifey."  
I stop dead and glare over my shoulder at him. "What did you just say?" I growl.  
He pulls the corner of his mouth downward and holds up his hands. "Nothing."  
"Yeah, my ass." I reply before I start to walk again.


	4. Chapter 4

**Hi guys, so I have a new update. I hope you like it as well. Enjoy.**

 **T73.**

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I stare at the glass board on which is Lisa Flanagan's photo is attached. I frown and chew on the nail of my pinky. How do we progress without informations that only Dillinger could give us? I blink a few times as Frost flops down on his chair.  
"Does Lisa had family in the area of Boston?" I ask him.  
He thinks short and shakes his head. "No, her whole family died in a family died in a plan crash. And I mean her whole family. From her own parents to her children."  
"God," I whisper and glance at him. "That's probably why she lost ground. She had no one."  
He nods his head again and takes a deep breath. "Internal Affairs won't let us talk to Dillinger?"  
I huff and shake my head. I don't even want to think about those idiots. Suddenly a thought crosses my mind. I think I know how I can get the informations that we need so desperately.  
I get up to my feet and grab my jacket from the back of the chair. I stop when I hear a familiar clicking of heels on the floor. I turn to the entrance of the bullpen and frown as Maura enters the office. She holds an folder in her hands. I thrust my chin to the file. "What's that?"  
She licks her lips. "The tox-screen of Lisa Flanagan."  
I take the file from her hands and my eyebrows shoot up as I read the results. "Alcohol and cocaine. She was celebrating a party."  
She raises briefly her eyebrows. "Yes. From the irritations of her nasal mucous membranes I can tell that she was a long time consumer. The hair analysis will confirm it."  
I slowly nod my head. "Perhaps she started to consume it after her whole family died."  
Frost nods agreeing. "Probably."  
Maura looks long at me. "Where are you going?"  
I drop the file to my desk and grab the photo of Lisa Flanagan from the board. "Visiting an old friend of mine."  
"Want some company?" Frost asks and want to get up from his chair.  
"He won't talk to you." I reply with a small smile. "I'll be fine."  
My wife grabs me at my elbow. "Jane." she says worriedly.  
I know she is worried because my worst nightmare is in a jail like my source of information. I once told her that. And everytime I have to go there, I get Goosebumps. I furrow my eyebrows and try to smile. But I know that it is more like an grimace.  
She sighs heavily. "Don't forget to pick me up. We came here together in your Jeep."  
I chuckle and wink at her. "I'll be here when you're ready to go."  
She smiles and nods her head.  
I start to leave and put on my jacket with a slight frown. Oops, I almost forgot that little detail. I shake my head as I push the button of the elevator. How the hell can someone forget that they came to work in the same car as their wife?  
I groan and close my eyes.  
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The room in that I am currently sitting is grey and dull. And the windows that are missing surely would depress me with their view.  
I really don't know why some people prefer to live in here instead in freedom. But I think that's a special thing for some criminals.  
The cool metal of the table that's screw on in the concrete floor burns into my skin. I always get an feeling of claustrophobia in one of this kind of interview rooms. I close my eyes and take a deep breath. I tense up and open my eyes again as soon as I hear the rattling of chains. I exhale slowly through my nose as the door opens.  
He has changed a lot since the last time I've saw him.  
His ash blonde hair are only a few millimeters long now and he is more beefy.  
I don't believe that he has a lot to do these days. Well, I don't hold it against him.  
He glares at me as the ward pushes him down on the metal chair.  
I smile at the ward. "Can we ... have a private talk?"  
He nods his head. "I'll be right outside."  
I smile my best faked smile at him. "Thank you." I glance at the inmate. "How are you doing?"  
"Now you are afraid of my wellbeing? Is that why you are here?" hr shoots back.  
I lick my lips and sigh. I really can't blame him for that. But hey, I've only done my job and I don't like him, either.  
He places his cuffed hands on the table. "I am sure that you are not here to have a small talk with me."  
"No," I reply. "I want to know if you have some informations for me."  
He laughs and leans back in the chair. "Why should I help you? You put me and my brother in here. And you got my brother killed."  
I have to laugh too, even though it pisses him more off. I shake my head. "I am sorry but no. No, you put yourself into here. By all your actions. And you put your brother in here too. He was loyal to you. And now you should honor his loyalty." I place Lisa's photo on the table. "Do you know her, Terry?"  
Terry clenches his teeth and plays with the edges of the photo. "Maybe she was a couple of times at our races. But she was more interested in selling drugs instead of the event itself. I told her to get lost but she just kept on showing up."  
I frown deeply and furl my eyebrows. "What happened next?"  
"She still showed up and told me that I should mind my own business. Told me that I should get lost. I asked her for whom she is working but she just told me that I rather don't know it."  
I take a deep breath. "Why?"  
Terry shrugs his shoulders. "I only know that everybody calls him _The_ _Ghost_."

I place the photo of Dillinger on the table. "Is that _The Ghost_?"  
"Are you slow off the mark?" he replies. "You know why he's called _The Ghost_?"

"Because of the same reason why you called me _Speedy_?"

"Exactly." he says and furls his eyebrows. "But he is called that because none of us ever saw him."  
I slowly close my eyes. God damn it.  
"You only get to him when you drive races again, again." he says.  
Exactly those are the words I didn't want to hear from an inmate. I get up from my chair go to the metal door. I knock against it.  
"Hey," Terry shouts. "what are you doing for me?"  
I drop my chin to my chest and take a deep breath. "I'll get you easing of detention conditions."  
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I have picked up Maura at the BPD and head straight back to our house. The informations that I got from Terry Bennett still troubles me ... A lot. I don't want to drive races again. I have wrapped my fingers tightly around the steering wheel of my Jeep.  
Maura doesn't say a word but sighs several times.  
I stop the car in the driveway and kill the humming engine. I close my eyes as my wife places an hand in my nape.  
Sometimes she can be really wordy but now she is silent.  
I open my eyes again and try to lock Detective Jane Rizzoli away and try to be just Jane.  
I groan and drop my head to the steering wheel. I turn my head to her and frown. "What?"  
She shakes her head. "You worry too much, Jane."  
I sigh and straighten up again. I am about to open my door when I spot a car that's strange to me. I don't know why because it is a dark sedan and it parks at the curb. The driver of the car sits behind the steering wheel and is staring at us. Or I think he is staring at us.  
Maura wants to open the passenger's door.  
My head swirls to her side and she stops dead in her track. "Keep the door closed."  
"Why?" she asks. "What's wrong?"  
This is a very good question. What the hell is wrong? Maybe nothing. Maybe this man is just waiting for someone. But I can't explain the uneasy feeling that I got.  
I unbuckle my seatbelt and look at my wife. "Keep the doors closed and stay put, Maura. No matter what will happen."  
"Jane ..." she says with an shaking voice.  
I open the driver's door and sigh. "Just do what I told you. I don't want that something happens to you."  
She hesitates but nods her head. Then she fishes her phone out of her purse.  
I take a deep breath and get out of the Jeep. I look over my shoulder as soon as I hear that Maura locks the car from inside. I try to smile a little before I start to walk towards the sedan. No matter how hard I try to tell my brain that this guy is just waiting for his wife or girlfriend my instincts tell me that this man means threat. I push my jacket over my gun and place my hand on its grip.  
The man suddenly starts the car's engine.  
I furl my eyebrows and start to walk faster.  
He smirks at me and turn the car on the street.  
I pull my gun out of its holster but the car disappears already.  
My heart thuds hard against my ribcage. What the hell just happened? Who was this guy? What did he want? Why did he smile at me? Is he one of Dillinger's henchmen? Did he try to intimidate me? Well, it didn't work. It just pisses me off even more.  
I take a deep breath and put the gun back in its holster. I turn on my heels and head back to my Jeep.  
Maura gets out of the car and glances questioningly at me. "Who was that man?"  
I walk over to her and place my hand on the small of her back. "I don't know. Come on, let's get inside."  
She doesn't say anything and unlocks the front door.  
I look once again over my shoulder to make sure that this guy is really gone before we enter the house.  
I immediately lock the door again and active the alarm system. I glance at Maura and sigh heavily as I see her facial expression. I walk over to the fridge and take a beer out of it. I don't say a word and open the bottle while she pours herself a glass of wine.  
I blink a few times and sip my beer.  
She does the same with her wine but I can feel that she won't be silent for long.  
I put the bottle down on the surface of the kitchen island and brace myself on it with both of my hands as I close my eyes.  
"Jane, what happened out there?" my wife asks.  
There. I knew that the silence won't last for long. "I don't know." I whisper.  
"I am not quite sure if I am willed to believe that." she replies.  
I lick my lips and rub my forehead with my left hand. "I really don't know what happened."  
"Did your old friend threatened you when you visited him today? Did he threatened us?"  
I shake my head and down my drink to the half. "No."  
She glares at me. "Could you please tell me with more words where you did go today and how you knew that this man meant danger for us?"  
I sigh heavily and glance at her. "I just knew it, Maura. I am a cop. It's my job to sense when there is a potential threat." I say and want to go up the stairs.  
Maura follows me. "I won't accept this answer, Jane."  
I can hear it in her voice that she mean it. But what does she want me to say? I told her the truth. I groan and walk down the hall. "What do you want me to say?"  
"What about the truth?" she asks back.  
I open the door to our bedroom and enter it. I put off my jacket and throw it over the back of a chair.  
She sighs and takes it into her hand to hang it on its hanger.  
I pull my red shirt over my head and flop down on the bed before I bury my face in my hands. "I told you the truth, Maura."  
She walks over to the walk-in closet and slips out of her high heels. "Okay, then tell me where you were today."  
I lay back on the mattress and sigh again. "I paid Terry Bennett a visit. I wanted to know if he knows Flanagan or Dillinger."  
"And?" comes the question out of the closet.  
I lean up on my elbows and frown deeply. "He told me that he has seen Flanagan a couple of times at some events, selling some drugs. But he never saw Dillinger."  
Maura steps only in her underwear out of the closet. "Is it possible that Terry Bennett sent this man after you?"  
I stare at her and blink a few times. That thought didn't cross my mind. Yes, it is possible. I mean I betrayed him and put him behind bars. I can imagine that Terry Bennett is really pretty pissed off of me. And his brother Troy got killed in prison. "Yeah, it's possible. I don't know who this guy was or to whom he belongs to. The only thought I had when I saw him was that I have to keep you safe."  
She sighs and steps between my legs. "I know, Jane."  
I sit up and wrap my arms around her middle. I place my head on her collarbone and close my eyes. Because of my heedless attempt to get some informations I'd risk her and my life. Good job, Jane. I shake my head and exhale slowly through my nose. "I'm sorry, Maura."  
She caresses my cheek and my neck with her hand. "For what?"  
I look up at her and frown. "I try to keep you safe but instead I bring the danger to our home. I failed miserably."  
She shakes her head and lean it down. "No, you only tried to do your job. You couldn't have known that someone was following you. And as soon as you noticed it you've tried to protect me."  
"That worked well." I reply sarcastically.  
"I'm not hurt, am I?"  
I close my eyes and shake my head.  
She tugs a strand of hair behind my ear and kisses me gently.  
I sigh and let my hands wander up her spine.  
She straightens up a little before she pushes me back on the mattress. She kisses me along my collarbone. "You're already too tense." she whispers against my skin and my eyes roll in the back of my head. "I cam provide the remedy."  
Jesus, that sounds too good.  
"Will you let me help you?" she breathes as she unbuckles my belt.  
I furrow my eyebrows and sit up a little. "Maura ..."  
She smiles seductively at me as she undoes the button of my pants. "It's okay, Jane. We are married, it's a give and take. You always spoil me. Now I want to do the same to you. Lift your butt ... please."  
I swallow hard and do as she ask.  
Maura hooks her fingers in the waistband of my pants and panties and pulls them down them down my legs.  
I close my eyes and groan as I feel her hands over my legs. I start to think that it only be a quickie so I can relief some stress. I frown as she puts off my boots and slips my legs out of my trouser. I open my eyes and my heart skips a beat when I see her kneeling down between my legs. Now I know that it won't be just a quickie.  
I know it sounds stupid but I am still not really comfortable with this kind of situations. Especially because it's my wife who is about to go down on me. I really don't want act coyly but it always happens in those situations.  
Maura smiles again and slides her hands over my thighs. "Skid down a little."  
"Maura, you don't have to." I say even I know my actions say something else as I skid down until I sit on the edge of the bed.  
"I know, but I want to." she replies before she kisses the inside of my thigh.  
I close my eyes tightly when she reaches the place where I need her the most. "Good God." I whisper as she sucks on my clit. She is right, that's exactly what I need and I kinda feel bad for that. A deep moan escapes from my throat and I bury a hand in her hair.  
She sighs and caresses my thighs as she let her tongue run over my clit.  
Many of people already told me that I sometimes act like a man, at work and in bedrooms. And I never minded because I knew that I probably would never see them again. But with Maura it is different.  
She never said something like that and still I feel like a God damn man when she goes down on me.  
I arch my back as soon as the first wave of pleasure rips through me.  
She moans deeply and doesn't stop her work.  
I know she is doing this because she wants to. That she wants to bring me some relief. That she feels the need to put hands on me.  
I arch my back again and link our hands. I force my eyes open and look down on me to see her head moving rhythmically between my legs. "Jesus." I grunt. I will be always overwhelmed by that sight. And I will always feel more like a man because of looking down at me while she pleases me in that way.  
She opens her eyes and looks up at me. She holds my gaze and slows her pace.  
I know that she does that because she knows that this is driving me completely nuts. I hate that she knows me and my body that well. But shouldn't it always that way in a marriage? Knowing what the partner likes and doesn't like in and outside of the bedroom.  
I furl my eyebrows and growl low as she run her tongue over my entrance. I would give my left hand if she would push her tongue or her fingers into me. But I know that it won't happen and I whimper.  
She moans again as I open my legs wider and collects everything that gush out of my with her tongue.  
Normally I would blush crimson at the thought but not this time. This time I am not ashamed of that.  
My orgasm rips forcefully through my body and I sit up to still her head with my hands.  
She looks up at me and licks her lips with a broad grin.  
I growl and pull her up to me.  
She crawls up and frowns. "You're still half dressed."  
"You don't say." I chuckle low and kiss her gently. I moan as I taste myself on her lips and cup her left breast with my hand.  
Maura breaks the kiss and shakes her head. "No, this was about you, Jane."  
"But ..." I start to protest and raise my eyebrows as she silence me with her lips.  
"No buts tonight." she whispers against my lips.


	5. Chapter 5

**So, I have a little update. I know it's a little short but I hope you like it anyway. It's more a kind of a filler. Of course you are welcome to tell me your mind.**

 **Enjoy.**

 **T73.**

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I have taken a shower and got dressed in a grey yoga pants and a black tank top, socks are on my feet.  
I run with my wet hair down the stairs and pause when I see my wife in her silver silky pajama standing at the kitchen island.  
She is holding a glass of wine in her hand and a knowing smile plays around her lips. She turns to the fridge and takes a beer out of it.  
I sigh loudly and walk over to her. I grab her at her waist and pull her closer. "I love you, Maura."  
"You only say that because I have satisfied you with my mouth."  
Now it's the right time to turn turn crimson and that's exactly what my face does.  
She chuckles and places an gentle kiss on my chin. "Jane, it's perfectly fine when you like it if your wife goes down on you. I like it too."  
"Maura." I growl. I know that she talks about the nights when I go down on her. But she is more open-minded then I am and is able to vocalize what she does like and what she doesn't like so much. But when she says that to me it arouses me and that's what she does know it.  
I let my hands wander to her butt and pull her even closer to my body. Suddenly imagines of how ger previous lovers put their hands on her, satisfying her, invades my mind. This doesn't happen that often anymore. But when it happens, it angers me and I feel the urge to claim her.  
A primeval growl rumbles from my cheat. "You are mine alone." I say before I sink my teeth into her pale neck.  
She gasps when she realizes that I don't care if I leave mark on that part of her body. She tilts her head to the left side to grant me more access. "Yes." she whispers. "I am only yours."  
I know exactly that these thoughts of a man satisfying her, fucking her, claiming her, are totally irrational. I know that she would never cheat on me. But that part of my brain won't work right now.  
Pictures of how such a fucker is shoving his fucking dick into my wife flashes through my mind and the feeling of not being enough for her spreads in my chest. I am not able to satisfy her sexually nor to keep her safe physically.  
How could I ever be enough for her at all?  
I pretend to be as hard as a rock but on the inside I am just a little child who wants to be loved by someone else than her mother.  
I still don't understand why someone like Maura wants me in her life, why she has married **me**.

I exhale shakily through my nose and tighten my grin. "Please don't leave me." I mumble against her skin.  
Maura notices the change of my mood and runs an hand over my neck. "What?" she whispers back.  
I look at her with pleading eyes. "Please don't leave me, Maura." I repeat. I can see her heart breaking a little and I want to slap myself for that stupid sentence.  
She searches my eyes with her own. "Why would I leave you?"  
I search in my brain for an good answer but find none. I furrow my eyebrows and shake my head. "I don't know." I croak. I can see the hurt look and close my eyes. Now even I would leave me. Well done, Jane. You screwed up your marriage within barely two months. What I haven't expected is a pair of soft lips on my own. My knees buckle a little and I whimper.  
"I love you, Jane." Maura whispers against my lips and I can feel her eyes on my face. "And nothing ... **Absolutely nothing** will take me away from you."

I nod my head and sigh. My eyes snap open as someone rings the doorbell and I frown. "Did you order dinner while I was taking a shower?"  
Maura shakes her head in confusion. "No."  
My body tense up and I walk to the door. I glance over at her and point at my wife. "You stay were you are." I whisper. "And if it is needed you run up and lock the bedroom door." I say and clench my teeth when she is about to protest. "Understood?"  
She hesitates but nods her head.  
I **hate** that left my god damn gun in our bedroom. I look through the small window next to the front door. We really should talk about an door with a peephole.

I frown as soon as I spot the uninvited guest and glance at Maura. "Really?"  
"What?" she squeals.  
I unlock the front door and open it.  
Frankie grins at me and holds up an bottle of Maura's favorite Bordeaux and a six-pack of beer for me. "Maura has called me. I sleep on the couch."  
I roll my eyes. The incident with that guy is almost two hours ago. " **Really**?"

Maura smiles innocently at me and shrugs her shoulders. "What shall I say? I was scared."  
I smile broadly and shake my head. "The encounter was almost two hours ago. We could have been dead already."  
My brother flops down on the couch. "Well, I am here now and the two of you look pretty alive to me."  
I roll my eyes once more and I slap the back of his head.  
My beloved wife chuckles amused.  
"By the way," I say and give her a kiss. "we have a guestroom, Frankie."  
"I also could move in in your guest house."  
"Over my dead body." I reply and chuckle as he glares at me. I glance at Maura and sigh. I know that she was scared when she has called my brother. And I am happy that he came by as she asked him for help. Even though hours later.  
She sees my expression and chuckles before she takes a deep breath.  
I smile broadly at her and shake my head.  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Cavanaugh is sitting in his desk chair and frowns deeply. "And you are absolutely sure that we can trust Terry Bennett?"  
"He has no vantage of my visit." I reply and lick my lips. "And I haven't announced my visit."  
Frost is standing next to,me and has an stoic face. I know that he is really mad at me.  
Korsak is not saying a word at all.  
Cavanaugh leans forward and frowns deeply. "So, we know that Flanagan was dirty. Do we know for whom she was working?"  
I feel like I've betrayed my own family and hesitate for a second. "Terry just said that Lisa Flanagan was working for a person who is called _The Ghost_ and that she told him that Terry doesn't want to mess with him."

Frost huffs and I glare at him.  
What the ... When did he became my mother?"  
Cavanaugh ignores our wordless dispute and looks at me. "How can we get to this ... **Ghost**?"

"Same old song, Sir." I answer.  
Cavanaugh stares at the three of us. His eyes are glued at Frost. "Reactivate her cover." he orders.  
Frost takes a step forward and is about to say something. His facial muscles twitches. "Yes, Sir." he almost growls and storms out of the office.  
I follow him hot on his heels. "What the hell is wrong with you?" I ask louder.  
He turns around and I almost bump into him. He glares at me. "Are you seriously asking me that?"  
I raise my arms slightly and drop them back to my sides. "Help me out."  
He steps up on me and points to his own chest. "I am your partner, Jane. I was your best man on your wedding. But you rely more on Korsak. He told me about your last actions in the last undercover operation. What am I? Only a means to an end?"  
What the fuck? Since when does he think that? I clench my teeth and shove him into the break room. How can he dare to ask me something like that? The amusing days are definitely over.  
Korsak wants to follow us into the room.  
I glare at the older man and point at him. "Stay put, Vince."  
He raises his hands and steps back.  
I exhale loudly through my nose and slam the door shut. I pierce Frost with my gaze as soon as I turn to him. "I didn't told you because I know you would react that way." I yell at him.  
"Because it's an one way ticket." he yells back at me.  
I inhale shakily and clench my teeth. "You are my best friend, Frost. I need your backup in this."  
He closes his eyes and snorts. "You know that I will always have your back, Jane."  
I punch his shoulder slightly. "But I also need you that you have Maura's back as well in the case ..."  
"Don't even dare to go there, Jane." he cuts me short.  
I smile and we shake our hands.  
I squeeze his hand tightly and hold his gaze. I sigh and smile a little as I see in his eyes that he will take care of my wife if something unexpected happens.  
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I am sitting on Maura's really uncomfortable couch in her office and frown deeply. I don't frown because the couch is uncomfortable but because of the news I have to deliver.  
Maura enters her office and put off her coat lost in her thoughts.  
I smile a little and get up to my feet before I close the door behind her. "Hey."  
She winces and twists around. "Jane." she says startled.  
I smile softly and walk up to her. But I know that I can't fool her.  
"Oh." she simply says with an deep frown. "You don't have any good news, do you?"  
I take a deep breath and shake my head. "I am afraid no." I say and swallow hard. "Cavanaugh ordered to reactivate my old undercover character to bring down Dillinger."  
She sits down in her designer office chair and crosses her right leg over her left. She let the information sink in and licks her lips. "But Dillinger does know who you are. Isn't it too dangerous to send you undercover again? Why can't go Korsak or Frost?"  
I hook my thumbs in the loops of my pant and raise my shoulders. "I am already established in the street racer scene. It's easier for me, Maura. And he won't know that I am going after him. Officially we're continuing our old investigation."  
Maura clasps her hands in front of her mouth, frowning thoughtfully. "How are you going to explain your absence to the other racers?"  
I pull the corners of my mouth downward. "An one year imprisonment."  
She considers my answer and sighs. "I don't know, Jane."  
I am not quite sure if she is aware that I am not down here to ask for her permission or that the decision is already made. I am only down here to inform my wife so she doesn't feels overlooked.  
"I know that it doesn't matter what I am thinking or saying." she says like she has been reading my mind. "And I know that you are only down here to tell me what you are going about to do. But I am allowed to say that I'm taking issue with the plan."  
"Of course you are." I agree.  
Maura nods her head and leans back in her chair. "When are you going back undercover?"  
I furrow my eyebrows and my answer will hurt myself. "As soon as possible. That means tomorrow."  
"That fast?"  
"That's our only chance to bring Dillinger down as fast as possible."  
She smiles weakly. "I understand."  
I exhale through my nose and point with my right thumb over my shoulder. "I should go up again. I see you at home." I say and turn to leave.  
"Jane." Maura says.  
"Yeah?" I reply and look over my shoulder.  
She takes a deep breath. "Thank you foe telling me."  
I smile a little but say nothing before I leave her office.  
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I sit in a black yoga pants and in one of my BPD shirts on the couch in our living room and stare at the black screen of the TV on the wall. I caress absentmindedly my wife's arm.  
Maura has placed her head on my collarbone and slips her right hand underneath my shirt. She smiles and sighs contently. "Since the day we have met I love this."  
I furl my eyebrows and look down at her. "What do you love?"  
"That," she says as she runs her hand over my bare belly.  
I am a little confused. "That you are allowed to caress my belly?"  
She rolls her eyes. "That I can caress your muscli abdominis."  
I narrow my eyes. "So, you only dated and married me because of my abs? Damn, and I thought you've done it because my charm and my personality."  
She chuckles and kisses my chin. "Those qualities aren't so bad too."  
I scoff and sip my beer. "Thanks a lot."  
She smiles and sighs. "Before I moved back to Boston I didn't thought that I would be married a year later."  
"Me neither." I chuckle and kiss her temple. "But a year ago I didn't know that the most beautiful and kind-hearted woman would almost knock me down when I go on my morning run. But I am very, very grateful for that."  
Maura snuggles up to me more closer. "Me too. And thank you."  
A smile plays around my lips. "I love you, Maura."  
"I love you too." she mumbles against my skin.  
I smile broadly and take a deep breath. This is probably one of the last relaxed moments that we're going to have for a while and I want to enjoy it as much as possible.


	6. Chapter 6

**Hey guys, so I have another update for Fast Lane -Hunter's Night. I hope you enjoy it. And as always, you are welcome to tell me what you think. Enjoy.**

 **T73.**

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I sit on the edge of our bed and frown deeply as I stare ahead. I am not really comfortable with the idea to go back undercover and to pretend that nothing of what has happened the last year was real. I glance down at my wedding band and twist it for a couple of times. I normally don't wear any jewelry beside my wristwatch and my wedding band. But with time, this simple white gold ring became a part of me. Of me but not of my undercover character. Jane Valluzi is unmarried.  
I lick my lips before I slip off the ring. My eyes shoot up when I hear a horrified gasp. Maura stands at the door of the bathroom.  
She is wearing a light blue and white dress. Damn, I was so lost in my thoughts that I didn't hear her entering the room. I can see the sheer horror in her eyes.  
I place the ring on my bedside table and get up to my feet. I walk over to her and take her left hand in my own. I run my thumb over her rings. I clench briefly my teeth and look deeply into her eyes. "It won't change anything, Maura. We are still a married couple. I just ... I just can't wear my wedding band when I am undercover. I hope ..." I hesitate and swallow hard. "I hope you can understand that."  
She closes her eyes and nods her head.  
I wrap my arms around her and pull her closer to me.  
"Just be careful, Jane." she whispers.  
I close my eyes and kiss the top of her head.  
She pulls away a little and looks down at my body. She smiles softly. "Now you look exactly like the first time we met."  
I look down at myself as she hooks her fingers in my studded belt. I wear a black jeans and a red t-shirt and my hair is up in a ponytail again.  
I frown as I look at her. "I don't know of that is a good or a bad thing."  
She runs her hands over my arms and smiles. "Definitely good. At that time I fell in love with you."  
"Right," I whisper before I capture her lips with my own.  
Maura wraps her arms around my neck and moans softly.  
I let my hands wander to her butt and give it a light squeeze.  
She moans again and breaks the kiss. "I think you just ruined my underwear."  
I raise my eyebrows with a smirk. "That easily?"  
She grins mischievously and pulls away from me. "You know how arousing it is for me even when you just look at me."  
My jaw hits the floor as soon as her words reaches my brain and I raise my eyebrows high. Did she really have to say that just before I have to go undercover? How the hell shall I focus now? I growl low and want to go after her just to show her how much I don't care that she could be late for work.  
Maura turns around and shoves my black motorcycle helmet into my chest. "You will need that."  
I stare blankly at her and hold the helmet to my chest? What just happened? One moment ago she was all sexy and seductively, and now she seems to be pretty pissed off. What?  
"What do you think you're coming home?" she asks when she gets out of the closet, holding a pair of creme colored high heels in her hand.  
I lick my lips and frown. "I don't know, Maura. Are you mad at me?"  
She sits down on the bed and slips on a shoe. "Why do you think that?"  
I place my helmet on my right hip and shrug my shoulders. "I don't know. Maybe because one minute you are all seductively and in the next one you are pushing me away."  
Now it is her turn to frown as she slips on the second shoe and gets up to her feet. "That wasn't my intention. I just noticed that I will be late for work." she sighs and wraps her arms around my neck. "Please come home in one piece, Jane. I don't want to have you stick you up on the couch again."  
I roll my eyes. "I'll try."  
She smiles and kisses me gently. "I love you, Jane."  
I take a deep breath. "I love you too, Maura. So much."  
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I bring my bike to an halt on the parking lot in the near of CJ's car repair shop and pull off the helmet. A bead of sweat runs down my face and I suck the fresh air deeply into my lungs. I don't know why it is but I have the feeling that it's getting hotter every year.  
CJ comes towards me. She is wearing white tank top and a grey overall that's smeared with oil. She wipes her hands in a towel and raises her eyebrows. "You're looking like the day we met. Are you having martial problems?"  
I smile half-hearted at her. "Funny. No, I am at work."  
"What a shame." she replies.  
I furl my eyebrows and scoff. "It would be okay for you if I would have martial problems?"  
"It would rise my chances." she replies.  
I chuckle amused. "You never give up, do you?"  
She grins broadly. "I am not known for that. So, what can I do for you, Jane Rizzoli."  
"You have to bring me back into the street racer scene." I say.  
She chuckles and shoved her hands in the pockets of her overall. "I am no longer active in that kind of business."  
I scoff again and raise an eyebrow. "Who are you trying to fool, CJ. Old habits die hard."  
"You got me." she laughs. "I am still a bad girl. You can cuff and punish me."  
I laugh and shake my head. "Still married, girl."  
She shrugs her shoulders. "Not seeing a ring."  
I turn serious again and the tip of my thumb runs over the empty spot on my left ring finger. I take a deep breath. "Can you bring me in again?"  
CJ realized that she pushed the wrong button and raises her eyebrows. "You have no car to race with. How are you suppose to join those races. Running after them?"  
I lick my lips and sigh. "Let that be my problem. I'll find a solution."  
She nods her head. "I'll see what I can do."  
I take a deep breath. "Thanks."  
"Those who know you surely want to know where you have been for a year."  
A smile tugs on the corners of my lips. "I can come up with a good story."  
"All right." she says and turns to leave again. "I'll call you."  
I smile and stare down at my helmet. How the hell am I suppose to drive races? In a damn velocipede? Well, maybe I have to ask my beloved wife if I can borrow her extravagant. But if I'll crash it, I am sure that she will kill me.  
I roll my eyes as my phone starts vibrating in the pocket of my jeans. I open the new message that I have received and frown deeply. I pull the helmet over my head and start the engine of my Triumph.  
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I stop my bike as soon as I spot Maura and her ridiculous Prius and put off my helmet. I wear a deep frown on my forehead. I don't get immediately off of my Triumph. "Why ... are we meeting at a car dealer, Maura?" Especially at a extravagant car dealer. I look up at the sign of four rings and my heart skips a beat. I always liked that kind of cars and I always knew that I could never afford one of those cars with my lousy salary. Well, I also never believed that I would marry into an wealthy family ... Um, yes. But I didn't married Maura to have a better social and financial status, or to have some benefits. I hate where my train of thoughts is leading me. I glance at my wife with a deep frown. Wasn't she wearing a light blue dress instead of the emerald green one that she's wearing now? "Didn't you wear a different dress this morning?"  
Maura rolls her eyes. "You don't want to hear that story."  
"Oh yes, I do."I reply with a broad smile."  
"I just say decomposing body."  
I wrinkle my nose and furl my eyebrows. "Did it explode ..." I hold up my hands as she is about to answer. "Don't answer that. Why are we here, Maura?"  
She smiles broadly and thrusts her chin to the glass building. "A friend of my father owns this shop. I thought that you could need a good car for your new undercover operation. And I thought that we could take a look. See it like an late birthday present."  
I lower my eyebrows and clench my teeth. "If you want to buy me a late birthday present then buy me a new watch for thirty bucks instead of a new car."  
She rolls her eyes and links her arm with mine. "Would you please let me make the decision what I am buying you, Jane? Come on."  
I exhale loudly through my mouth and enter with her the good damn shop.  
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I swear I feel like a little child in a candy store as we walk the showrooms. I mean, also as James, the friend of Maura's father, shows us their _family cars_.

Latest now I realize that worlds sometimes separates us. But I have to admit that it kinda feels great to enter her world for a second. To pretend that I can afford one of those cars. A family model, yeah, I could afford but not an exclusive car. No way.  
I gasp when we reach the department of sports cars.  
I almost run to the cobalt blue Audi R8. I lick my dry lips and force myself to keep my sweaty hands off of it. I am aware that I am grinning like a Cheshire cat. Jesus, I always wanted to just sit in such a car.  
"Do you like it?" Maura asks with a smile.  
I look with big eyes at her. I have thousand words in my head but I am sure that if I would open my mouth only stupid things would come out. So I decide to say nothing.  
She walks over to me and places an hand on my arm. "Do you like it, Jane?"  
I only nod my head to answer her question.  
She smiles broadly at me. "Good, because then it is yours."  
My breath hitch in my throat and I take a step back. Mine? What the hell is she talking about? I don't have enough money. I can't afford that. Unless ... I stare dumbfounded at her and start to shake my head as the words start to make sense. "Maura ..." I start to protest.  
"It's. Okay, Jane." she cuts me off and steps closer. "I know what you are going to say. That this is too much. But I want to do this for you. Let me do this for you."  
My heart is thudding hard against my ribcage. I hate that she can permanently read my mind. I know that she is meaning it well but this is definitely too much. I can't accept a present like that. I furrow my eyebrows as I see her hopeful eyes and my resistance gives in. I lick my lips and take a deep breath. "Okay." I whisper.  
Her eyebrows shoots up. "Okay?"  
I take another deep breath and nod my head. "Okay."  
She beams at me and kisses me gently. "What about the color? We can let it change if you don't like it."  
I smile a little and shake my head. "No, it is perfect like it is." I look down at her and smile. "Thank you, Maura."  
She kisses me again. "You're welcome."  
I stare at the Audi and frown again. I can't believe it. I am really a owner of an Audi R8.  
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I sit at the dining table and read through the files of my latest undercover operation and through the cases of Dillinger while I am chewing on my salami sandwich.  
Maura is going through our mail and is sorting it by our names. It is an daily routine of hers.  
And I don't mind it a bit. I take another bite of my food and turn the page of the file that I am currently reading. Since the day I know Maura I am a regular eater. That's why I am not **that** skinny anymore. In the past I was able to go without eating for one or two, sometimes even three days. Now I am almost dying after just one.

"Oh shoot." she suddenly says.  
My eyes shoot up to hers and I furl my eyebrows. I know that she doesn't say something like that without a reason. "What's wrong?" I ask.  
She glances at me. "This is a invitation for an art exhibition of my mother."  
I lean back in my chair. "Okay."  
She holds the invitation up. "It do come from my mother. It's this weekend, here in Boston."  
"I didn't know that Constance would come to Boston." I state and cross my arms over my chest.  
"Me neither." my wife replies and looks at me worriedly. "Where is she going to stay?"  
I scratch my neck and raise my eyebrows. "Well, Boston have a lot of nice hotels."  
She glares at me. "Jane, we are talking about my mother."  
"I know." I say as casual as possible and get up to get me a new beer. "I mean when she wouldn't have a place where she can stay she would have told you. Hey, she is Constance Isles. Every hotel manager will welcome her with open arms."  
Maura warns me with her gaze. "We do own a empty guest house."  
I open the bottle and shrug my shoulders. "If Constance wants to stay here then she knows where she can find us."  
She rolls her eyes and walks over to the kitchen island. She knows exactly that her mother and I don't get along very well.  
Okay, she accepted the fact that her daughter married an blue-collar cop who also is a woman but that doesn't mean that we are best friends. She doesn't like me and I don't like her, either.  
Maura opens an bottle of red wine and sighs. "Could you at least please pretend that you like my mother?"  
I don't know. Can I? I shrug my shoulders and sip my beer.  
"On Sunday, you will behave." she says as she pours herself a glass of wine.  
I choke on my beer and furl my eyebrows. "Why?"  
She sips her wine and glance at me. "On Sunday, the art exhibition will take place."  
My shoulders slump and I furrow my eyebrows. "Wh ... Maura, I have to work. I don't have the time to go to an fancy art exhibition of your mother."  
She takes the glass from the kitchen island and strolls over to me. She places her left arm on my shoulder and smiles sweetly. "The invitation for the two of us and I don't want to go alone this time. And maybe ... just maybe I have another gift for you on Sunday."  
I raise an skeptical eyebrow but sigh as she kisses me. My free hand automatically fly to her hip and pull her closer. I deepen the kiss and let my hand wander to her butt. I pull her even closer and break the kiss as things start to get out of control. I swallow hard and pierce her with my gaze. "What if I want to unwrap my gift now?"  
She smirks and walks away from me.  
What? I roll my eyes. I swear this woman will be the death of me.


	7. Chapter 7

**Hey, guys. Sorry for that delay, but I had some sort of writer's block. But finally I have an update for this story. I hope you will like it. As always, you're welcome to write a review. Enjoy.**

 **T73.**

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I frown and force my eyes open as I hear an buzzing noise.  
I try to find out if my eyes are still closed or if it's still in the middle of the night, because the bedroom is still deep dark.  
I see a small light on the nightstand and take a deep breath as I realize that it is my phone that's buzzing.  
I reach out for the device and make a faces as I am blinded by the light of the display.  
Maura stirs a little in my arm.  
I lick my lips and accept the call. "What?" I ask drowsy.  
"Jane," Frost replies. "where are you?"  
What? Where the hell am I supposed to be at this time of the night? Of course I am at Maura's side. "In bed. Why are you calling me at this unholy time, Frost?"  
Maura opens her eyes and frowns as she looks up at me. "Who's that?" she whispers.  
"Frost." I mouth back.  
She groans and snuggles into me.  
"Operations didn't call you or Maura yet?" he asks back.  
If I could be able, I would roll my eyes. "No. What is it, Frost?"  
He is silent for a moment. "We have another body." he pauses again."It's Benjamin Everman's brother."  
I immediately sit up, not caring if I'm waking up Maura. "You have to be kidding me." I almost shout.  
She sighs annoyed and switches on the lamp.  
I blink a few times, but I am fully awake now.  
I can't say the same thing about my wife.  
She sighs heavily and rubs the sleep from her eyes.  
Sometimes I really hate out jobs.  
I sigh and get out of the bed. "Where's the crime scene?"  
"I already sent you the address." he says and ends the call.  
I stare at the phone in my hand and then at Maura, I furl my eyebrows because I think she felt back asleep. "Come on, Maura."  
"I don't want to." she mumbles.  
I have to smile a little, I really do understand her.  
Only four hours ago we got to bed.  
I walk to the walk-in closet. "I don't want to, too, but criminals doesn't care about our sleep. Come on, we have another murder."  
She groans once more and gets out of the bed, too.  
I furl my eyebrows and chuckle.  
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I already see the blue lights already flashing at the fishing docks from the distance, and I stop my Jeep.  
I'm wearing a dark sweater and a pair of jeans.  
Maura has decided for a jeans, too, a purple shirt and a light brown leather jacket.  
I really don't know how she manages it at that time to look like ... that.  
I always look like ... well, me.  
We get out of the car and head to the crime scene tape.  
The officer smiles at me. "Running a little late, huh, Rizzoli?"  
I roll my eyes and duck under the tape. "And you're still wearing your uniform, huh, Parker?"  
He glares at me and huffs before he eyes my wife's butt.  
"I don't like him." Maura whispers.  
I still glare at him and put on a pair of gloves. "I am sure he does enjoy the view of your backside."  
She scoffs and put on her own gloves.  
I furl my eyebrows. "At that point you say that it only matters to you when I stare at your ass."  
She frowns a little. "Why would I say that?"  
I stop and glare at her. "Because I am your wife and only I am allowed to stare at you and your butt."  
"Well," she replies. "that's all true, but at a crime scene even you should focus on the case and not on my backside."  
I frown and open my mouth to reply something snappy as Korsak comes up to us.  
I sigh heavily and look at him. "Ben Everman's brother got killed?"

He nods agreeing.  
Maura looks at us questioningly. "You know the victim's name already?"  
"Yeah," I say and wring my hands. "You were pretty pissed off when I tried to work for his brother Benjamin."  
She just raises her eyebrows.  
Korsak clears throat. "It looks like an execution. Shoot to the back of his ..." he trails of when he sees Maura's disapproving look. "He has a gunshot wound to his head."  
I grin broadly. "Come on, Maura. You can't judge him for jumping to conclusions. Before you became the Chief Medical Examiner, we had to deal with Pike."  
She takes a deep breath and kneels down next to Xander Everman.  
I look with an worried face at Korsak. "Where's Frost?"  
"Adding a few little details to the CV of your other you." he answers.  
I grimace and make a hissing sound. "I really have to go undercover, don't I?"  
He makes a face and nods.  
I stomp my foot to the ground and growl.  
I already knew the answer.  
I turn to my wife and furrow my eyebrows. "Since when is he dead?"  
She looks up to me and frowns. "According to the liver temperature ..." she sighs heavily. "Six hours."  
I clench my teeth and look back at Korsak. "Where was Dillinger in that period of time?"  
"Frost has to check that, too."  
I sigh and look down at the body.  
This reunion with Ben will be really great.  
I can't walk around and tell everybody that I am actually a god damn cop.  
If I do so, I can see myself already in a body bag after just one day of my undercover operation.  
But I think that's where have start now, in the street racer scene.  
Now, I have to swallow my pride. "Maura could I borrow your Mercedes?"  
She looks up at me and frowns. "Of course, Jane."  
I start to step backwards and furrow my eyebrows. "Vince, would you mind taking Maura to the station?"  
He shakes his head while Maura is getting up to her feet. "Of course not." he says.  
I think they both know exactly that I am about to do something incredibly stupid.  
But hey, we have to start somewhere, don't we?  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
I am still not comfortable with driving Maura's Mercedes AMG, but it has to work for me now.  
CJ sighs in the passenger's seat.  
I glare at her. "What?"  
She's glaring back at me. "Could you at least act like you own this car?"  
I furl my eyebrows. "I ... own this damn car."  
"No," she laughs and frowns. "your wife owns this car and you're driving it like you're scared that it could get a scratch."  
I shift into the next gear and frown. "It's a Mercedes AMG. Can you imagine what Maura will do to me when it really gets a stent or a scratch?"  
She chuckles amused. "When I just imagine what she's doing to you at all, I'm getting jealous."  
I chuckle, too, and shake my head. "You're a dead loss."  
"Unfortunately." CJ replies and points through the windshield at a crowded parking lot. "There they are."  
I nod and look briefly at her. "And Ben will be there, too?"  
"As far as I know."  
I maneuver the car onto the parking lot and frown deeply. "Don't forget. Ben probably doesn't know about his brother's death. So, don't mention Xander until he does it himself. Understand?"  
She nods and unbuckles her seatbelt.  
I take a deep breath and do the same.  
We get out of the Mercedes and CJ gets welcomed by a couple of people.  
I sigh and shove my hands in the pockets of my jeans.  
I look out for Ben and spot him immediately.  
He goes straight to CJ. He wraps his arms around her and lift her off the ground.  
What the hell?  
Did she forget to mention a few little details?  
I thought she would be gay.  
He sees me and places her back,on her feet.  
He rounds the car and glare at me. "What the hell are you doing here?"  
I shrug and lick my lips. "Attending a meeting of your crew."  
He steps into my personal space. "You are not one of my guys. You should go."  
I raise my hands but don't step back. "I just drove a friend of mine here. Calm down, man."  
CJ is stepping between us and places her hands on his chest. "She's cool, Ben."  
His facial muscles are twitching. "Did you know that she came to me a year ago to work for me?" he asks and she looks surprised at me. "I thought you were reliable. Isn't that what you told me?"  
I shrug again. "It's hard to be reliable when you're in prison."  
"I thought you would be a great driver." he replies.  
I raise my eyebrows. "Even I can have bad days."  
He looks at CJ. "Are you trusting her?"  
She nods agreeing. "She helped mr more than once. Yeah, I trust her."  
I know she says it because it's a little bit true and because she believes that I'm a good person, but to be honest she helped me even more.  
He still glares at me. "All right. Come on."  
I raise my eyebrows and follow them.  
Well, that was a lot easier than I thought.  
Ben leads us to a free spot in the center of the parking lot.  
He looks at the tall black guy and furls his eyebrows. "Where the fuck is my little brother? He knows that we're only waiting for him."  
My heart skips a beat and I frown deeply. "Is there a special occasion?"  
"It's none of your business." Ben spits and I clench my teeth.  
"It's B's birthday." the black guy informs me.  
I look long at him and my frown deepens.  
Great, happy birthday, Ben. Your Xander got killed last night.  
Yay.  
I flinch a little as my new buddy hands me a beer.  
I still frown and hesitate for a moment.  
Really? At that time of day.  
But then I grab. It's a birthday party, isn't it?  
Ben lights a cigarette and holds it to CJ, but she shakes her head.  
Ben rolls his eyes. "You'll never change, huh? What about you, Jamie?"  
I look at the damn cigarette and I notice that it isn't just a cigarette. It's a good damn dobbie.  
I frown and shake my head. "It's Jane, and I drink and fuck but I don't smoke shit like that."  
He stares at me and bursts out laughing, and the others join him. "You're the first driver who says something like that. Well, beside CJ. Thank God, you have a bit brain. But next time you won't get away that easily."  
The next time ... Fuck!  
I smile at him and down my beer.  
He laughs again. "Mike, bring her another beer."  
Mike, the guy who has told me that today's Ben's birthday, hands me another beer.  
"Thanks." I mumble.  
Ben sits down on the hood of his car and leans back. "So, tell mr, Jane. I don't have the feeling that someone like me could get into your panties. Is CJ the one that you are fucking?"  
I chock on my beer as I sip it and looks at CJ, but she just shrugs.  
I wipe my mouth with the back of my hand and frown. "Um ... no. She's not exactly my type."  
He's grinning and his left hand is wandering over her back. "You're missing something. She's really good in bed."  
She rolls her eyes and shrugs his hand off. "Touch me like that ever again and you will lose your hand."  
I grunt as I stifle a laugh.  
I was right when I met her the first time. She is dangerous.  
Ben chuckles amused. "See, she got temperament. You're missing out something really good. What's your type, Jane?"  
I frown deeply.  
How do I answer that question?  
Well, my type ... If there is no blonde in his crew who looks like Maura's twin. Well, then I have no interest in any of his woman.  
"Blondes."CJ is saving my ass and looks at me, and I furrow my eyebrows when she makes big eyes. "She's into blond chics."  
I swallow hard and look at Ben.  
He laughs again. "Nice taste."  
My heart drops and force myself to smile. "Yeah," I agree. "Blondes are the best."  
CJ glares at me and takes a deep breath.  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

I lay in my bed and am happy that I can sleep it off.  
I know that I wasn't able to go back to the precinct after Ben's little birthday party and went straight back to bed.  
I barely remember how I got home.  
I wince and gag as something drops on my belly.  
I groan and blink against the bright light in the room.  
How late is it? Damn it.  
"You look awful." I hear a voice. "And the house smells like a pub."  
I groan again and shield my eyes with my hand from the light. "What time is it?" I croak.  
"It's time for you to get out of the bed and for me to get out of my clothes." Maura replies.  
My hand drop to the sheets, but I regret it immediately. "Ow."  
"What is it?"  
I rub my left temple and frown. "My head is killing me."  
She sits down on the edge of the bed and sighs. "You need to drink a lot of water and orange juice."  
"I need to drink a lot of something that is not mixed with alcohol." I say and dare to open my eyes. "Really, Maura. What time is it?"  
"Two in the noon."  
I sigh heavily. "Crap." I notice the file on my belly.  
She takes a deep breath. "The autopsy report from Xander Everman's autopsy."  
I exhale slowly through my mouth after had gag again. I hate to feel nausea. "He died because of the shot to his head, didn't he?"  
"Yes." she says. "But I also found scratches on his knees."  
I open,my eyes and frown. "He was kneeling down."  
"Yes, Korsak was right. It was an execution. The bullet was shot from a short range. The gunpowder was tattooed into his skin."  
I frown even though my head kills me. "So, Korsak was really right."  
"Yeah." she repeats.  
I look at her and smile a little. I know how much she hates it when she has to admit that one of us Detectives was right.  
I raise an eyebrow. "Any drugs in his system?" I ask and drop the file to the floor.  
Why should I read the report when the Medical Examiner is right in my bedroom right now.  
She nods. "Yeah, alcohol and cocaine."  
"So, he got ready for his brother's birthday party." I state and I can see my wife's unpleasant face.  
"Should I be worried?" she asks worriedly.  
I sigh and lay back on the mattress.  
I knew that this question would be coming after Xander's drug screening. "The only thing you will find in ny system is blood ..." I groan. "And alcohol. I did no drugs."  
"Alcohol is a drug." Maura replies and frowns. "That's why I am concerned, Jane."  
I sigh heavily and close my eyes again.  
I know that my own body is hating me for drinking my head off. I normally only drink one or two beers ... at some times even three.  
And shots I only drink when I feel really miserable.  
So, I would be concerned too if I would be in Maura's shoes. "We should talk about children." slips out of my mouth instead of You don't have to worry or What was the caliber of the bullet.  
My eyes snap open and I furl my eyebrows.  
Where the hell did that came from?  
I always was one of these women who said I am gay, I don't need children.  
I really don't know why I said that.  
I stare into the blank face of my wife. "I ... I don't know why I said that. I ... am sorry?"  
"I didn't know that you want to have children." Maura says and frowns.  
I sit up and frown, too. "I didn't know that either." I reply. "I don't know why that crossed or slipped my mind."  
I really don't know. It never crushed my mind and I shake my head.  
She takes my face between her hands. "If I would have known that you want to have children, I wouldn't have married you."  
My heart stops beating and all color drains from my face.  
I have never felt so hurt like right now ever before. "We can sign the divorce papers."  
Maura laughs heartily and runs her hand over my cheek. "You just took me by surprise, Jane. Two minutes ago, we were talking about a dead man and know we're talking about children."  
I moan and close my eyes when she runs her hand through my hair. "I think I should get more sleep before I get in trouble."  
She chuckles. "Definitely."


	8. Chapter 8

**Hey, guys. Finally I have a new update for this story. Thanks for the comments and for the following, it means much to me. I hope you'll like this chapter. Enjoy.**

 **T73.**

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

I am groaning as I wake up and frown deeply. I really had a weird dream in which Maura and I were talking about kids. What the hell is my brain thinking?  
I get out of the bed and have an awful taste in my mouth, it's like I haven't brushed my teeth for the last four days. I make a face and head to the bathroom, brushing my teeth for the next five minutes but it doesn't really help.  
After that and taking a long, cold shower I stomp down the down the stairs and freeze as I see my wife standing in the kitchen.  
What the ... I thought it was just a dream, but she's for real sitting at the kitchen island and is wearing her silky pajama, doing her crossword.  
I lick my lips and sigh heavily. What time is it, and did we really talk about children? Damn it!  
Maura's looking up and smiles at me. "Do you want to have alcohol? Beer? Wine? Something stronger?"  
I turn up my nose and groan. "Just water ... with a lot of lemon."  
I can see that she can't hide her amused smile and she gets up form her high chair. She's opening the door of the fridge and takes out the water carafe.  
She pours me a glass if water and pass it to me.  
"Thanks," I mumble before I down it with one swig, welcoming the cool liquid in my dry throat. "Why didn't you wake me?"  
She's sipping her tea and shrugs. "I thought you could use some more rest."  
I briefly close my eyes and sit down next to her. I really shouldn't have been drinking that much. That should be a lesson.  
"Jane," she says and I look at her. "we should talk."  
Crap, that doesn't sound pretty good. What have I done now?  
I take a deep breath and nod slightly. "Uh, okay."  
She's taking a deep breath and is turning her body on her chair so she can look at me. "We should talk about what you have mentioned yesterday in your half drunken state."  
I frown and search my brain for what she's meaning. Suddenly it crush my mind that the whole conversation wasn't just a dream. My eyebrows are shooting up. "You mean ... Um ... kids?"  
My wife sips her tea and nods agreeing. "Yes."  
I am refilling my glass and sigh heavily. "Listen, it was just a thought that crossed my drunken mind. I don't even know why I said it out loud."  
She's silent for a moment and swallows hard. "I didn't know that you want to have children."  
I scratch the back of my head and furrow my eyebrows. "How could you? I mean, I never said to you that I want to have kids one day. Hell, even I didn't know that I want to have a bunch of children or maybe living in a burn."  
"I didn't thought that you would give a thought about things like that," she replies with a slight smile.  
"Well, once I did," I reply with a shrug. "Once ... When I was ten. There I thought I would be married to a handsome man." I reply with a wryly grin.  
Maura's rolling her eyes and scoffs. "I'm trying to have a serious conversation with you, Jane."  
I clear my throat and wipe the smile off my face. "I know, I'm sorry. Don't you to have children?"  
She's thinking about my question and sighs. "I don't know. I mean, I haven't really thought about it. I ... You know, I can't really see myself as a mother."  
I look long and a little confused at her and my heart is dropping. "Why not?"  
"You know that my parents are not really that warm-hearted. I didn't experienced all those things that you and your brothers experienced in your youth. I ... I am afraid that I could become a mother like my own."  
I waste no second and am right at my wife's side. I take her hands in my own and take a deep breath. "You know, we don't have to make any decisions today or tomorrow, or in the next couple of months. I know, we always said that we don't rush things, and then we did quite the opposite. But a decision to have children or not having children is life-changing, and I really don't want rush this. And even though you're thinking that you probably will turn into a Constance 2.0, I know that you won't , because you are anything but her. You hear me?"  
She smiles that smile that always turns me into pudding and nods agreeing.  
I smile back at her and kiss the top of her head. "I love you, Maura."  
"I love you too," she whispers back and wraps her arms around my middle, pulling me closer to hug me.  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

I'm sitting on a park bench and place my elbows on my knees, leaning forward. I haven't expected that Maura would be so afraid of starting our own family, or that she would become like her own mother. I mean, I know that Constance can bean ice-cold woman, but Maura could never be like that. I know that because I see her interact with my nephew.  
Everytime I see them with each other it is beautiful and it warms my heart, maybe that's why I suddenly feel the urge to have children with her.  
I flinch a little when someone sits down next to me and I turn my head to see CJ grinning at me, rolling my eyes. "How the hell did I got home yesterday?"  
She is still grinning and shrugs. "I drove you home after you were done."  
"Thanks," I mumble.  
She sighs dramatically and crosses her legs. "Ben was impressed of your drinking abilities yesterday."  
"Yeah?" I ask and frown slightly. "My head and my liver didn't thank me for that. I won't mention my wife."  
"Is there trouble in paradise?"  
"Nothing that I can't really fix," I reply and look at her. "Does Ben give me another shot?"  
CJ pass me a note and raises an eyebrow. "Yeah, but you have to do something for him first."  
I take a look at the note and furl my eyebrows. "A car dealer? What the hell? Shall I buy him a freaking new car?"  
"Kinda," she replies and is licking her lips. "You have to get him a car, but without money."  
I'm looking long at her and my eyebrows are shooting up as I start to understand. "You are aware of the fact that I'm a cop, aren't you?"  
She's glaring at me. "You want another shot? You have to do things that you are condemning."  
I clench my teeth and exhale through my nose. "All right, has it to be a specific car?"  
She points at the note that I am shoving into the pocket of my jeans. "Yes, it has to be exactly that car on the note I gave you."  
I roll my eyes once more. Of course it has to be exactly this one. Why should Ben make it easy for me. Frost will be so proud. Yay, I can't wait to commit a ... "When does he wanna have it?"  
"Monday," she simply answers.  
I glare at her and run a hand through my hair. Wonderful, my day can't get any better, but I have to take it right now as it comes. It's a case of sink or swim. I can't risk my only chance again.  
I take a deep breath and get up from the bench. "All right, then. I guess we'll see at Monday."  
She nods and licks her lips. "You have to be careful, Jane. If you fail this time, it'll won't end good for you."  
I furl my eyebrows as I look down at her and I can see her worried gaze. I know that she's trying to warn and help me.  
I smile a little and hold my scarred hands up. "I made it through a lot worse things already, CJ. I will make it through that, too."  
She tries to smile but it looks more like a grimace. "Just ... be careful, would ya?"  
I chuckle and wink at her. "Don't worry, girl," I say and turn to leave. As soon as she's out of sight my smile vanish again.  
Yeah I made it through a lot of things, but just barely.  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

I sit at a table in the Dirty Robber and am enjoying my beloved burger even though my stomach is protesting, but I don't give a shit right now. I am starving and I will eat even if I throw up later.  
I frown as Frost us sitting down at the opposite of the table and I wipe my mouth with a napkin. "Thanks for coming," I say after swallowing the food with water.  
He's frowning deeply. "You really want to do this? Are you sure?"  
I take a deep breath and another bite of my burger. "Mm, yeah," I reply.  
"Is it clear to you that this could be the end of your career when you get caught in the time you're doing that?" He asks skeptically.  
I exhale through my nose and place the burger back on the plate. "I know that it is risky, Frost. And I know that this can cost me everything I worked for, but I have to get back Ben's trust. Please take care of it that there won't be any uniformed in the near that night."  
"Yeah, sure, I just wave my little magic wand," he says sarcastically and I choke on my food. He furl his eyebrows but smirks. "I talked about my other magic wand."  
I chuckle amused and sip my water. "Yeah, sure."  
He's rolling his eyes and frowns suddenly. "Everything's good between you and Maura?"  
I look questioningly at him and nod. "Yeah, why?"  
"This morning she seemed to be a little bit off as she came to work," he answers.  
I'm slowing my chewing and swallow hard. "It's just ... It's because something we talked about this morning. I think it threw her off a little."  
"No need to worry?"  
I scoff and shake my head. "No need to worry, but thanks for asking."  
He takes a deep breath. "You would tell us when something's wrong, wouldn't you?"  
No, I wouldn't until Maura and I would have fixed the problem.  
I smile at him. "Sure." _Liar_ , yells my brain at me. I roll my eyes and down the rest of my water.  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Maura is leaning with her back against the headboard of our bed and is reading in one of her medical journals and doesn't look at me as I join her.  
I frown slightly and let my left hand wander over her bare thigh.  
Finally a smile starts to tug on the sides of her lips but she still doesn't put that damn journal to the side.  
My frown deepens and my thumb starts to draw circles on her soft skin after I slipped my hand under the hem of her nightie.  
She licks her lips and turns the page.  
What the hell? She has to be kidding me. Since when is she so stand-offish? That really nerves. I really have to change my tactics.  
I lean on my right elbow and kiss her along her shoulder, just earning a deep sigh but she still doesn't put that damn journal away.  
I growl low and bit gently her shoulder.  
She's gasping and turns the next page.  
Slowly but surely I am not sure anymore if she is still reading, that's why I trail kisses over her neck, sucking gently on her weak spot.  
Maura moans and tilts her head to the side ... And turns the next page?  
"Are you kidding me?" I growl a little frustrated.  
My wife tosses the journal to the floor next to the bed and is pushing me onto my back, straddling my hips. "Yes, I am."  
My hands are automatically landing on her hips and I pull her a little up.  
She's smiling seductively at me. "I've stopped reading since you joined me in bed."  
I swallow back a growl and slide my hands over her bare thighs. Dear Lord, what I want to do to her right now.  
She slips her hands under my shirt and we both have to moan. "I want you," she husks. "I want you so badly."  
I waste no time and slip two fingers inside of her and I have to frown as I feel how ready she is and that she's holding my gaze. And because she isn't wearing panties.  
Maura's eyes falling shut and she's moaning deeply. She bites her bottom lip and forces her eyes open again. "Yes, but I don't want you that way."  
Eh? Yes, but she doesn't want me that way? Did I miss something? How else am I supposed to please her?  
I can feel that she's fighting the urge to roll her hips and and I buckle mine.  
She's gasping and leans down and pull me deeper into her. "Yes, like that," she whispers into my ear. "But I want your hands all over me."  
My eyes falling shut and I clench my teeth. How on earth shall I have my hands all over her and ... **Oh**!

My breath is hitching in my throat. "Oh," I just can breathe.  
"Yeah," she snickers into my ear.  
It doesn't take us very long to get rid of our clothes and to attach the strap-on at my hips.  
I lay back on the mattress and have to swallow hard as my wife straddles my hips again.  
I have to look down and a whimper escapes from my throat as soon as the dildo disappears in Maura.  
She's holding my gaze now and smirks. "You like to see that, don't you?"  
Jesus, I would die if I would that everytime when we get intimate.  
I swallow hard and run my over her toned stomach, up between the valley of her absolutely perfect breasts, nodding agreeing.  
I hesitate for a second and cup the right one, running my thumb over her stiffen nipple.  
Maura's moaning again and sits up a little because I act like this would be the first time we're using the strap-on, or my first time at all.  
I have no idea what wrong with me right now or why I act like I never have had sex before.  
I have to close my eyes and clench my teeth repeatedly as she starts to move on top of me.  
I grunt as I can feel every single movement and don't dare to open my mouth nor my eyes.  
Suddenly my whole body starts to shake because I know I have to look at my wife or I won't last very long.  
I force my eyes open and furl my eyebrows because she's looking with confused but also lustful eyes at me.  
I groan and sit up a little and start to support her movements with my hands.  
Maura's leaning a little forward and exhales shakily through her mouth as I finally come back to my senses.  
Just such small sounds from her are pushing me right to the edge. I don't need screams and permanent moans or talking.  
I sit up as much as much as possible and our bodies are flushed against each other.  
Maura moans and is digging the nails of one hand into the back of my back and the nails of the other one into my shoulder.  
A good sign for me, a sign that it is what she wants and needs.  
A deep moan escapes from my throat and I trail kisses over her collarbone, and a shiver runs down my spine as she whimpers.  
It doesn't always have to be rough and fast when we're using the strap-on, it also can be slow and sensual. Like it is right now.  
I hold her as close as possible while I slip slowly out of her and fill her again.  
"Oh, God," she whispers and holds tight on me.  
I look up at her and she kisses me gently before her whole body went rigid and I know that her orgasm is floating through her.  
My body starts to shake again, but this time not because of nothing but because I experience an orgasm myself that is always shattering my world.  
I hold her close and hold my breath until the feeling is calming down again. I look up at her and tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. "Hey," I whisper.  
She smiles down at me and kisses me gently. "Hi."  
I still have my arms wrapped around her waist and place my forehead against her collarbone, sighing content. "That was -"  
"Yes," she finishes my sentence and sighs as well, running her hands over my neck and shoulders.  
"I love you," I mumble against her skin and inhale her smell deeply.  
Maura smiles at me and gets off of my lap. "I love you too, Jane."  
I wriggle out of the harness and drop it to the floor before I lay back down on the mattress. I take a deep breath and pull her closer to me. I can tell, I have never felt such love for any other woman in my entire life like I do feel for this woman who is right now in my arms.  
I would go for Maura until the end of the world and back if I would have to, and even further.  
I look down at her smiling face and can't help the broad grin on my lips.  
She starts to chuckle. "What is it?"  
I take a deep breath and I shake my head. "Nothing," I answer and I can tell by her smile that she's feeling the same way than I do.  
And sometimes I can be a boor, but I also now that words are sometimes really unnecessary, and right now is such a moment.  
I kiss her once again and sigh content before I turn of the nightstand lamp.


	9. Chapter 9

**Hey, guys. I finally have a new update for this story. I hope you will like it as well. Enjoy.**

 **T73.**

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On the whole ride my brows are furled the whole time. I have picked up the Audi R8 Cóupe before I had to my next destination. I know exactly where the freelance street racers are meeting. And I know that they are not the most reliable persons in the entire city, but I have to start with something ... or someone. My fingers are wrapped tightly around the steering wheel and my teeth are clenched. This whole thing is already getting out of control, but I want to bring down this asshole John Dillinger. I bring my car to halt in front of CJ's car shop and its door opens immediately. My eyebrows shoot up as soon as I see her. She's wearing a white and really tight fabric trouser and a pink tank top. It doesn't really much room for any imaginations. I shake my head because just such thoughts are nor really appropriate because I am a married woman. I take a deep breath as I get out of my new car.  
She is eyeing it and smiles broadly. "Nice car. Maura is really big-hearted, huh?"  
I roll my eyes and cross my arms over my chest. "What makes you think that I didn't bought it myself?"  
She scoffs and nod at the Audi when she walks around it. "Let me take a look under the hood."  
I arche an brow and do as she said. "Won't you buy me a drink first," I ask as the backside jumps open. I round the car, too, and swallow hard as she's inspecting the engine closely.  
She looks over her shoulder and smirks when she notices that I look everywhere but at her. "Yeah, I can work with that. I also can remove the cruise control. If you want me to."  
I nod absentmindedly and when her words sink in, and I furl my eyebrows. "Yeah ... What? Wait. No! I didn't say that we'll work together."  
She straightens up again and turns with a raised chin back to me. She's crossing her arms over her chest. "Alright, tell me what to do when a car with an V-10 engine needs to be repaired or when it needs to be upgraded."  
"Well," I reply and she raises her brows. I huff resigned. "I have no idea."  
She smiles smugly. "And you don't have many options, Jane, do you?"  
I growl low and snort. "Fine, we're working together."  
"I can start today," she states.  
I shake my head in disagreement. "No, I need the Audi today."  
She looks skeptically at me. "For what?"  
I take a deep breath and tell her my new plan.  
CJ stares at me like I have lost my mind and like a monkey is sitting on my shoulder. "Are you insane," she ask with an high-pitched voice. "Why don't you ask your friends to have your back?"  
I lick my lips and frown. "Because I finally wanna close this damn case. And I need more persons in this scene than just you. No offense."  
She takes a deep breath and walks to the passenger's door. "All right, but I'm coming with you."  
I nod agreeing and walk to the driver's door. "Fine," I grumble again and sit down on the seat.  
She looks at me and smiles.  
I roll my eyes and start the car.  
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"You really must have lost your mind." CJ says when we arrive in the area of the Singing Beach. "But I am impressed that you still remember the place."  
I smile and see all the pimped cars already. It has to be a big party, please just not another birthday party. "I have an excellent memory." I take a deep breath. "CJ, you really don't have to be here."  
"And who should save your ass when you're in trouble, huh?"  
I scoff and shake my head as I maneuver the Audi on the parking lot. Here I picked up CJ for the very first time. "And what do you think you're doing when three of those guys are attacking me?"  
"I'll strip," she simply replies.  
I furl my eyebrows and turn my head with an disbelieving expression to my right. How the hell should that save me? Okay, it could give me enough time to get into the car and to drive off, but then what about CJ?  
She chuckles and gives me a good shove. "It was a joke. They won't attack you when I'm at your side. I know the most of them."  
I smile broadly and turn off the engine. "Why am I not surprised at all?"  
She shrugs and nods at the windshield. "Well, I can tell you that we have their attention now."  
I glance out of the windshield and can see that everybody is staring at us. Well, I somehow can understand it. The cars on the parking lot are just pimped Toyotas, Fords, VWs and other brands that I also could afford. I sigh and open the driver's door and CJ does the same with her own door..  
A man with Hispanic roots comes up to us and eyes us. "And who the hell are you?"  
CJ opens her mouth to answer the question, but then she stops as he holds his hand up.  
I roll my eyes. Does the freelance racers really have a leader, too? I sigh heavily and point at myself. "My name is Jane Valluzi."  
He nods slowly. "Your name sounds familiar."  
"Didn't she drove for the **Irish Freedom**?" A woman shouts from afar.

He narrows his eyes and steps closer.  
I blink for a couple of times, but I don't step back. "It's true. I was a driver of the Beckett brothers."  
"Tory Beckett is dead," he states.  
I take a deep breath and nod agreeing. "Yeah, I heard about that."  
A red haired man steps out of the crowd. He's tall and looks like he's about to rip off my head. "Tanja Stiller is dead, too. She was a friends of mine."  
I hold his gaze but my heart is dropping. Shit. Tanja Stiller, a name I haven't heard for quite a while. She got killed during my first undercover operation as a street racer. She tried to do the right thing and got killed by Tory and his buddy Toben. I lick my lips and sigh. "Yeah," I agree. "She was my friend, too."  
"What about Liam and Xander? They're dead, too." Replies a woman with brown hair.  
My facial muscles are twitching and I point at my chest. "I was in jail when Xander got killed." _Liar_.

The spokesman takes another step toward me. "Seems like everyone around you dies or gets arrested." He growls.  
I clench my teeth but I hold his piercing gaze. "I know."  
"Hey," CJ interferes and steps between him and me. "Enough! And your allegation is not true. What about Ben? And I feel pretty alive, too."  
Each of them turn their heads to her.  
She smirks and shrug. "I feel great."  
I'm sighing in relief. Well, she has a point. She's still alive because I reacted on her call and went to her cabin where a hitman was waiting for her.  
The spokesman steps back and he furl his eyebrows. "So, what do you want from us, Jane Valluzi?"  
I furrow my brows. Now it starts to make sense! Now I start to see the big picture. Everyone who helped me, knowingly or unknowingly, died or got arrested. **I** smoothed the way for Dillinger. They died because of me. I furl my brows and look long at him. "I think someone wants to checkmate me. And I need backup." I tell him truthfully.

CJ shoots me a confused look and she furl her eyebrows, too.  
I point at her and I lick my lips. "Before I went to jail, CJ gave me a call. A hitman waited for her at her cabin because we kept in touch." I say and her jaw drops to the ground. I remember the guy in front of my house and I grit my teeth. "I want backup. I **need** backup. I want to get ... revenge for all of their deaths. It is my fault, but I can't bring them back. I ... I just want to keep those I love safe."

"And who would that be?" He asks.  
I open my mouth to answer his question, but then I close it again.  
"Me," CJ says and walks over to me. She wraps her arms around my neck and frowns. Her eyes are saying _I'm sorry, but I'm trying to save your ass right now_. "She's trying to keep me safe."

She isn't so wrong, though. I really try to keep her safe and sound.  
CJ pulls my head down and closes the last gap of our lips.  
I have to resist the urge to push her away. Pictures of Maura are flashing through my head and I pull CJ closer. I growl and deepen the kiss. It only last a moment before she breaks the kiss again.  
What the hell? The kiss lasted only for a couple of seconds and it felt really wrong. I open my eyes and swallow hard.  
She looks apologetically at me, but I think she's seeing something else in my eyes. "She wants to protect us, Chase."  
I clench my teeth and sigh. Chase, what I think is his nickname, takes a deep breath and nods slowly. It seems like everybody does like CJ. "All right,what's our yield?"  
I drag my eyes to Chase and furrow my brows. "Fifty percent of my winnings." I say out loud and a hum goes through the rows. "Fifty percent for everyone who is supporting me. I'll drive for Ben Everman and all of you know that he pays good money."  
Chase crosses his arms over his chest. "And what do you want from us?"  
"I only want your loyalty." I answer and look at each of them. "I want your word. And everyone who's betraying me can expect that my revenge will come hard and merciless. I will hunt you and I will find you. The only thing I want to have is your loyalty."  
Chase takes a deep breath and nods agreeing. "I think you got your crew."  
I exhale slowly through my mouth and smile. That's more than I thought I would get. But thanks to CJ I got a entire crew.  
She looks at me and smiles broadly.  
"No one's gonna hurt CJ. Money isn't important," Chase says.  
I furrow my brows but smile. "She's a handful." I laugh as she climbs in the car.  
"Yes, she is." He laughs and we shake our hands. "Take good care of her. We all love her."  
I smile broadly and nod. "I will. I promise."  
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I drove straight to the precinct after I have dropped off CJ. I know I shouldn't have enjoyed kissing CJ like I did. I stomp down the hallway of the lab.  
"Oh," I hear Susie say as soon as she spots me. "Dr. Isles in her -"  
I am in Maura's office before the younger woman can finish the sentence. I slam the door shut and lock it. I close the blinds and walk up to the surprised blonde beauty who is sitting at her desk. I can see her questioningly gaze.  
Maura gets up from her chair as I tug on her hands and she frowns. "Jane, what is wrong?"  
I don't say a word and lift her with ease on her desk. I am about to break my own rule. To never have a sexual encounter at work.  
She's gasping and opens her legs a little more.  
"I want you," I growl as I step in between them.  
She bites her lower lip and frowns slightly. "And what about your rule?"  
"To hell with that." I growl again as I rip her panties aside. "I made it, I'll break it."  
She swallows back a moan when I run my thumb over her clit.  
I stop when I see the deep frown on her forehead and furl my eyebrows. "What is it? Don't you want me?"  
She licks her lips and takes a deep breath. "Not like that."  
I take a step backwards and frown myself. Not like that? What the hell? Then in what way?  
She runs her hands over my neck and smiles a little. I know that she can see my confusion in my eyes. "I'm your wife, Jane. You don't have to claim me."  
I tilt my head to the side and my frown deepens. Right. She's my wife. I am married to her. What the hell is happening to my brain right now.  
She's pushing me on my shoulders down until I'm kneeling in front of her. "You don't wanna leave me unsatisfied now, do you?"  
I look up at her and arche an brow, shaking my head. I have to admit that skirts really have their benefits... when Maura is wearing them. I push her panties down and bury my head between her legs. I can hear Maura sighing in relief and the deep moan that escapes from her throat. I love the sounds she's making when I bury my head between her legs and that she's running a hand through my hair everytime I go down on her.  
I accidentally grunt as I pull her closer to my face and I run my hands over her bare thighs.  
She whimpers and starts to roll her hips in the rhythm of my tongue.  
I groan deeply and suck on her clit. I know that she it's getting hard for her to stifle her moans because she digs her nails into my shoulders. I gather every single drop on my tongue that is coming out of her and I growl again as she opens her legs even more.  
"Oh," she whispers. "God."  
I'm holding her at her hips in place and suck harder on her clit. I know she likes it and I can feel her arching her back.  
Her whole body went rigid and a really deep moan passes her lips before she's pushing my head gently away.  
I look back up at her and wipe my mouth with the back of my hand, grinning broadly.  
Maura keeps her eyes closed and tries to calm her breath again.  
I get back up on my feet and kiss her gently.  
She moans once again when she's tasting herself on my lips. She pulls away and searches confused my eyes. "You broke your own rule. What happened, Jane?"  
I furl my eyebrows and open my mouth, but I close it again immediately. I certainly can't tell her that I have to pretend that CJ is my girlfriend. She would freak out. Hell, even I am freaking out at the thought. I take a deep breath and look deep into hazel eyes. "I needed to see you."  
"To claim me on my desk," she asks with a smile.  
"Uh," I say and furrow my eyebrows. "Well ... You seemed to enjoy it."  
Maura is still smiling and shrugs. "I really did. But you took me by surprise."  
I sigh heavily. "I know, and I'm sorry."  
She smiles again and kisses me once more. "Don't be. It was a good surprise."  
"Good," I reply and smirk. "Because I love you."  
Her smile grows bigger. "I love you too, Jane."  
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I sit at the bar counter in the Dirty Robber and sip my beer. I take a deep breath and stare at the muted TV. Someone is sitting down next to me and orders a beer. I turn my head to the side and a smile plays around my lips.  
Frankie looks over at me and chuckles.  
I smile and shake my head. "Frost brought you into the loop?"  
He nods his head and sips his own beer. "You can bet. Why didn't you tell me that you're going undercover again?"  
I'm sighing heavily and I pick at the beer label before I order a round of shots. "I didn't think that you want to be involved again."  
"You can be more than sure that I wanna be involved again," he huff and downs the tequila shot. "And now tell me the real reason, Jane."  
I roll my eyes and down my own shot. "I don't need a virtuecrat." I answer honestly.  
My brother chokes on his beer and frowns. "Excuse me," he asks with an high-pitched voice.  
I sigh heavily and turn my whole body to him. "Look, Frankie. It's not like I don't trust you or that I'm not thinking that you are not able to cope with the things that I am about to do." I take a deep breath and furrow my eyebrows. "This case is more complicated than I thought and I will have to make decisions that you won't agree with, and things that you won't agree with. And I don't want to put you in a situation when you'll maybe start to motivation."  
He's scrutinizing my face and frowns a little. "All right. But when you need help, you cone straight to me."  
I smile and sip my beer with a nod. "Sure thing."  
He sighs heavily and nods as well.  
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When I finally arrive at home the entire house is dark. I know that it's late and I am glad that Maura really hasn't waited for me. I slip out of my boots and place them at the front door. I don't want to make more noises than it's really necessary. I sigh and pull my shirt over my head as I make my way to the stairs. I don't care that I am still at the first floor, no one else then Maura and I are in the house. I make my way down the hallway to our bedroom. I crack the door open and am relieved that the bedroom is dark as well.  
After I have changed into my sleeping clothes I lay down on the bed and snuggle up to my beloved wife. I wrap my left arm around her middle.  
Maura sighs sleepily and she pulls me closer.  
I frown and relax against her body.  
"You are late," she mumbles.  
I kiss her neck. "Keep on sleeping. I'm home now."  
She places her hand over mine and nods already half asleep. "Good night, Jane."  
I smile a little and inhale her scent, "Night, Maura. I love you."  
"I love you too," she mumbles and I have to stifle my laugh.


	10. Note

_**I** **AM ABSOLUTELY HORRIFIED!**_

 **I was sitting at home in front of my TV to watch the soccer match between France and Germany like thousands of others, and I jumped as I heard the two explosions live in TV, but I didn't thought much of it until the sports commentator said that there were several attacks and that there were innocent people hurt and killed. Of course the sports event wasn't important to me anymore. I knew that terrorism is close to Europe, but it was the first time that I realized how real and how close terrorism is to my home country.**

 **But after all, all my thoughts and prayers are with the families and France. I am really out of words.**

 **But this cowardly attack reminds me once more that we have to stand close and that we are only strong when we stand close together, and that we are one, because those terrorist didn't only attack France. They attacked us all.**

 **Again, all my thoughts and prayers are with all Parisian and citizens of France.**

 **Typhoon73.**


	11. Chapter 11

**Hey, people. Finally I have a new update for Fast Lane-Hunter's Night, I know it's been an eternity. That's why I have to thank you for sticking with this story.**

 **I hope you're gonna like this chapter.**

 **Enjoy.**

 **T73.**

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I am sitting with a cup of coffee in my hand and a deep frown on my forehead on the couch and watch my lovely wife pacing up and down in the living room as she is muttering something inaudible to herself.

All right, it is Saturday and her mother has announced a spontaneous visit just half an hour ago, but that's nothing unusual.

Constance has the habit to tell us that she'll come by last minute.

But the house is clean and we have enough food for the next month in the fridge, there is no need to panic, right?

Right!

To be honest, I am nervous too, but I can mask it better than Maura.

I still watch Maura and place the mug on the coffee table before I get up to my feet.

I walk to her and grab her at her shoulders, looking directly into her eyes. "All right, **stop**. I'll get seasick when I'm watching you pacing up and down, Maura. The house is more than fine and we have more than enough food. Stop worrying."

"What is she thinking," she asks with an high-pitched voice. "She knows that our jobs have unpredictable working hours."

I furrow my eyebrows and look in my head for an good answer. "Um, maybe she is thinking _I don't see my only daughter often enough, and the last time I saw her is over an year ago. And_ _ **now**_ _it's about time_."

She rolls her eyes but she smiles a little. "You know that my mother doesn't think that way."

I lift an shoulder and smile wryly. "No, not really. I don't know in which ways your mother is thinking."

She is huffing and slaps my shoulder. "I am serious, Jane."

I flinch and chuckle. "All right, all right." I say and tub my shoulder with a smile. "Jeez! Okay, listen. Everything's gonna be fine, Maura. We go and have a nice afternoon with Constance, and before you kno -"

I freeze when my phone starts buzzing on the coffee table and Maura is glaring at me.

 **Oh, come on. You have to be kidding me!**

Maura opens her mouth to say something and looks warningly at me.

I furrow my eyebrows and make a face. "Know it the day is over and your mother is happy. And you will be happy."

I say hastily and head to the table.

I read the new message and groan loudly.

"Jane Rizzoli," she says more than warningly. "Don't you dare leaving me alone now."

I read the text message once more and hold my phone tightly in my hand.

I look guiltily at her. "I am so sorry, Maura." I croak and sigh.

My wife huffs again, crosses her arms over her chest and turns away.

I walk over to her and wrap my arms tightly around her middle from behind.

I don't know why, but I have the feeling that I hang her out to dry. And I can her anger because of me. "I am really sorry, Maura." I whisper and kiss her cheek.

She doesn't say a word or pull away, but her body is tense.

I sigh heavily and kiss her again. "I love you."

Maura wiggles out of my arms and doesn't say it back, but walks to the stairs.

I clench my teeth and start to type a message, it's to my mother.

I am asking her to support Maura today.

I know exactly what kind of … person Constance can be sometimes.

Jesus, I really have to watch my thoughts, she is my mother-in-law.

I don't want that Maura has to cope alone with her mother.

Ma can really be a pain in the ass sometimes, but when it comes to her children she is more than protective. And she sees Maura as one of her kids.

The thought is kinda weird because that would mean that I have married my own sister.

Does that mean that Maura and I are breeding?

I shudder at the thought and shake it off immediately.

How the hell should that even be possible? We're not even related.

I send the message and grab my keys from the end table. I swear to God, if that is not important I am going to kill CJ myself.

I sigh heavily and run up the stair. I almost forgot an important thing.

I enter the bedroom and frown as I hear the shower running.

I walk over to my bedside table and open the top drawer.

I take my Glock out of and risk a look at the bathroom door.

I am not quite sure if I should go into the bathroom, or just leave for today, to give my wife some time.

I take a deep breath and leave the bedroom again.

Sometimes a person needs some time for themselves.

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I bring my car to halt in CJ's driveway and kill the engine before I get out with a deep frown.

Her cabin looks like it is still in one piece and no offender is in sight.

I step on the front porch and knock three times at the door, but no one is opening it.

I take a look through the closed window and see no one.

Great, that's a way to play off a cop against a colleague.

Maybe she is fork-tongued and tries to get rid of her previous cop buddy.

I take a deep breath and walk around the house.

I arrive at the pool in the backyard and twist around immediately as I see CJ half naked in it. "All right," I say elongated and close my eyes.

CJ chuckle amused and I hear her movie. "There is nothing on my body that you haven't seen, Jane."

She is right. There is nothing I haven't seen, but she is naked and I am married. Married to a wonderful and beautiful woman who is pretty mad at me. And I am sure that she would ask for a divorce immediately when Maura would know about that.

"Yes, I know that, but you are naked and that's something I haven't seen … And I don't want to see it either."

"When we have to pretend that we are a couple then you should the things that Chase is knowing."

I am about to turn around, but stop myself in the same moment. "You've pretended that we are a couple, CJ. I had no idea. Just tell me what you like and where your most memorable freckles are. I can come up with stories."

She chuckles amused as she gets out of the said pool. "Don't be so narrow-minded, Jane. You can have a look yourself."

I clench my teeth and shake my head. "I am not narrow-minded, CJ. I am married."

She takes a deep breath and is silent for a couple of seconds when she gets out of the pool. "You didn't behaved really married yesterday when you have kissed me, detective."

I swallow hard and turn my body to her

Thank God, she is now wearing a robe. "In my head I wasn't kissing you, girl. I was -"

"Kissing Maura?" She asks with a wide smile. "Well, then I know why she has married you."

I press my lips to a thin line together and exhale loudly through my nose.

"What are you imaging when you're kissing her," CJ asks and steps closer. "That you are kissing me?"

Okay, that's enough even for me and I take a step back.

I grab her at her wrists when she is about to run her hands over my belly and I can see that she is shocked.

This is something only two person are allowed to do that. Maura and me.

" **Enough!** " I growl dangerously low. " **I am a married woman and you won't destroy that! Got it? You are really cute and kind, and I like you as a friend. That's why you're still not arrested. But you take it too far, CJ. You and I, that's not gonna happen.**

 **You are young and attractive, you'll find someone -** " I furrow my eyebrows and hold her gaze. "But you can't have me, because I love my wife, and I could never cheat on her. You have to stop all your flirting when we are alone."

She is staring blankly at me and I can see that she isn't used to rejections, swallowing hard. She places an hand over my heard and I become ridge.

She smiles and shakes her head. "I promise that I won't flirt or try to seduce you when it's not necessary. Do you wanna know why I helped you from the beginning?"

I hold her gaze and shrug. "Because of your brother?"

"No," CJ replies and shakes her head as well. "Because Tanja said to me that that you are not one of those assholes who only cares only about themselves. And she didn't know that you are a cop back then."

I still can hear Tanja's words. _Jane, you are a good person_.

It was the time when I saw her alive. And I couldn't save her.

I close my eyes and lick my lips, and a small whimper escapes from my throat.

CJ is running an hand over my cheek down my neck. "You are a good person, Jane. There is nothing you could have done."

I shake my head . "Don't say that," I whisper . "I am not such a good person that some people may think I am."

"Oh, yes, you are." She replies. "Look at you, you're still trying to save it every human being in this world."

"I'm must trying to find redemption."

"And for what?"

I have tears in my eyes as I look at her again. "I don't know.."

She smiles softly at me. "Go home to your wife, Jane."

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I come home and throw my keys into the bowl and walk into the kitchen.

My beloved wife is sitting at the dining table and looks up at me for a second. "How was your day? Mine was pretty on even terms and non-verbal glances with my mother."

"I'm so sorry," I mumble as I take her hand in my own and pull her up to her feet.

She can sense that something is off and frowns deeply. "Jane, what's wrong?"

"I never have showed you how much I really love you." I murmur and lift her off the floor with easiness.

She gasps in surprise and wraps her legs around my waist instantly.

I carry her carefully up the stairs without any thought about having sex, but I do need to feel her body next to mine to make sure that she is mine, and mine only.

I stop at the tread and glance up at this beautiful woman in my arms. "Maura." I whisper and I still can't believe my luck.

Hazel eyes are looking down at me and Maura is pressing gently her lips to mine.

I start to smile before I continue my way to our bedroom.

I sit her down on the edge of our bed after we've entered the room, and my wife lifts her arms over her head.

I really had no intention to have sex with her now, but how could I turn down such an invitation?

I grasp the hem of her dark gray shirt and start to pull it up, grazing her skin with my fingertips.

Maura licks her lips and hums approvingly as I pull my own shirt over my head and she let her lips graze my belly.

I swallow hard and close my eyes as she does so. Obviously, she has something completely different in her mind than I had only seconds before. "Maura, what are you doing?"

"I'm trying to help you relax," she mumbles against my skin and undoes the button of my jeans.

I groan and I am more than grateful that I am not a man, because that could be more than embarrassing right now.

I can feel her smile and I groan once more as a shiver course through my body.

So much about my plan of laying down in bed and hold her close to me.

I look down and meet amused hazel eyes, growling low.

In no time, Maura's bra is taken off and I push her carefully onto the mattress.

Maura smiles and is skidding up.

Now, I am hovering over her and look long into eyes I love so much before I kiss her down the neck.

She whimpers and her hands are roaming over my back. "Jane," she whispers.

I smile as I let my lips trail down her neck and over her collarbone. I swear to God, I have never touched such soft skin like that of my wife.

I look down at perky breasts and sigh at that sight. I let my tongue run over a stiffened nipple and earn an throaty moan that comes from Maura.

I suck and nibble on it before I pay the same attention to the other nipple.

Maura gasps and moans, and starts squirming under me.

I put my hands on her hips and hold her in place and swirl my tongue around the hard bud. I now that this can be tortuous, but I enjoy too much teasing her. And I enjoy her smell and taste too much as well.

She digs her nails in my shoulder and went rigid, arching her back.

I know the telltale sign and look up at her. I release the nipple again and furrow my brows with a smile when I see her blushing.

"I'm sorry." She says and buries ashamed her face in my pillow. "I didn't mean to orgasm just now."

I smile amused and kiss my way up again. I know that something like that can happen sometimes, it's not like I am inexperienced or never have had sex with Maura, and seeing my wife flustered is kinda cute. "It all right, Maura. You don't need to be embarrassed about it." I say and take a deep breath as I roll off of her. "And we have the whole night."

She rolls her eyes and turns on her side. She is swatting my hand as soon as my hand cups one of her full breasts. "No, we don't, Jane. We have to go to the exhibition tomorrow."

I groan again and make a face. "Can't I just take you all over again the whole night and you call Constance tomorrow, telling her that we can't show because you can't walk anymore?"

She gasps and swats my arm now. "Jane Rizzoli."

I chuckle amused and roll on my back.

Maura takes the opportunity and straddles my hips with a mischievous smirk.

I am arching an brow and my hands find their way on her hips. "I don't wanna get out of this bed ever at that sight."

She laughs and kisses me long, and demanding.

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I sit at the edge of our bed and frown deeply. I am wearing one of my better black suits and dark blue dress shirts.

I am absolutely not in the mood to go to this stupid exhibition, but when I am cancelling now Maura would be pretty mad at me.

I sigh heavily and slip into the shoes my wife has put out for me. I already know that I'm going to die in these tonight. Well, at least she doesn't force me to wear a dress. That would kill me for real.

I get up from the bed and my frown deepens as I put on my jacket.

Maura is coming out of the bathroom and chuckles.

I turn my head in her direction and I swear if we don't leave the bedroom soon we won't make it to the exhibition at all.

She is wearing an elegant black and white dress that is hugging her body at all the right places. Her hair is neatly pinned back, and she's wearing white high heels.

She smiles broadly at me and put an golden bracelet on, arching an eyebrow. "What is it?"

I walk over to her and take her left hand in my own, running my thumb over her wedding band. "Does any piece of clothing exist in this world in which you don't look breathtaking?"

There is a glint in her eyes when she spots my own wedding band on my finger and she smiles. "Yes, I am sure there is, Jane."

"I don't believe that." I state and let my eyes roam over her body. "You look stunning, Maura."

"Thank you." She whispers and wraps her arms around my neck. "You don't look so bad yourself."

I roll eyes and kiss her gently. "Thanks, Dr. Isles. You ready to go?"

Maura takes a deep breath and is nodding once. "Yes, I am."

I follow her and place an hand on the small of her back. "Let's go, then."

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The art exhibition is exactly how I thought that it would be. Pretentious, superficial and absolutely not my style.

The only thing that is my style right now is the grossly overpriced glass of champagne in my hand right now.

I flinch when someone is linking their arm with mine. "At least pretend that you are having a little bit of fun." Maura says and is smiling politely at the other guests.

I try to do the same, but my smile must look more like a grimace. "I can't, because I don't get any of this. It's just to show off. We were here, can we go now?"

Maura is about to reply something, but she stops when a slim figure is strolling over to us.

"Maura," says a familiar voice and I feel the urge to run. "It's so nice to see you here.

I growl low and wrap my left arm around my wife's waist, pulling her closer to my body.

I don't know why I have the feeling like my mother-in-law is daring our marriage every time I meet her.

Maura's smile falters a little as I tighten my hold. "I told you already yesterday that Jane and I would be present at this exhibition."

I arch an eyebrow because of her snippy remark.

Constance is blinking a couple of times before she gains her composure again. "You look as always beautiful."

"Thank you, you look wonderful too," my wife replies.

My lovely mother-in-law is eyeing me with a polite smile and I can tell that it is not candidly. " **Jane** , you look -"

I smile broadly at her and raise my eyebrows.

 _Come on, just say it. Say_ _ **You look like always**_ _or say_ _ **You look like you're about to leave for work in any second**_ _. Oh, I have another one. Say_ _ **You're looking like you are not worth my daughter**_ _._

 _Whom you'd neglected, for heaven's sake. Say it and be prepared for my reply._

"You are looking good as well," Constance finally finishes her sentence.

Maura clears her throat and is licking her lips.

I give Constance one of my best faked smile. "Thank you, Constance, I only can give that compliment back to you."

My wife is nudging my side with her elbow.

Constance recovers fast and looks briefly over shoulder.

A tall, blonde man appears on her right side and smiles at us, his blue eyes are lingering on Maura.

I have to swallow a loud growl and clench my teeth. He's kidding me, right?

Constance's mood is changing all of a sudden and she beams at her daughter. "Maura, let me introduce you to David McPherson. He is owning a really popular art gallery in New York."

"Oh," Maura says and shakes his hand. "It is nice to meet you."

"Likewise," he replies with a girly voice. "Constance is only speaking highly of you."

I can see that my wife is fighting with herself so she can keep up her smile.

A grunt escapes from my throat as I swallow down my laughter and stick my hand out. "Detective Jane Rizzoli." I introduce myself and Constance is scowling at me.

Honestly, I don't give a shit about that.

Maura seems to come around again and she looks apologetically up at me. "Oh, my God, that was my mistake." She now looks at him. "David, let me introduce you to Jane, my wife."

Now, I am truly smiling because I notice my mother-in-law's falling.

Seriously? Did she really thought that she could hook her daughter up with this namby-pamby boy?

Hey, I am not that bad looking too.

David is looking confused at the two of us and raises his eyebrows as the realization is setting in. "Oh, I didn't know that you are -"

"Yeah," I purr smirking. "I'm sure that Constance has forgotten to mention that Maura is married."

Constance is glaring at me and my smile grows bigger.

Maura drops her gaze to the floor to hide her amused smile as **David** is blushing.

I still smirk and have to suppress the urge to kiss her right here, in front of all of Constance's so called friends.

Constance huffs unladylike and turns to leave again.


	12. Chapter 12

**Hey, guys. I am so, so sorry for the long delay. But hey, the story is back now and I hope this update is gonna be worth the wait. I hope you will like it even though it is rather short. And of course you are welcome to tell me what you think about it.**

 **However, enjoy it.**

 **T73.**

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I frown a little and groan as soon as I slowly wake up. I am not really surprised that my wife isn't laying close to me because sometimes I am tossing and turning in my sleep especially when I am really stressed out, and being under cover again is something that is really stressing me out. And the encounter with Constance isn't really helping me either.

I know that I must have made strange sounds when I have been sleeping because I dreamt a nice dream about a certain blonde. In the beginning of the relationship with Maura I was embarrassed when I had those dreams, but with time I've learned that it doesn't bother her … as long as those dreams were about her, and the funny thing is, since I am with her no other woman invaded my dreams anymore. I know it is strange cause it is normal to fantasize about the sexy actress of the last move you have seen, or about the hot chick that stretched out in the commercial you've watched before you'd been drifting off to sleep. It never happened to me since I got to know Maura, those women had been replaced by her. So, every time when I say to her that she is the woman of my dreams, I mean it literally.

I take a deep breath and slowly tug the sheet off my face. I must have covered me because it was a very, very vivid dream. I can feel a pair of eyes on me and am sure that I stirred enough to tell my wife that I am about to wake up. I turn my head to the left and drag my eyes slowly open to be greeted by amused hazel ones. I swear to God, no matter how old I'll get, I'll never get tired to look into those eyes, I could drown in them every time we make eye contact. I rub my face with my hands and can't hide the smile that is tugging on the corners of my lips. "Morning." I mumble and look back at her.

Maura smiles broadly and traces my jaw with her fingertips. "Good morning." She says and arches an eyebrow. "You have been dreaming, Jane."

I nod slowly and look back at her. "It was about my favorite leading actress." My eyes drop shut when she runs her fingers through my hair. "You don't have to dream about it, Jane."

I scan the room and frown. "So, Olivia Wilde is downstairs and prepares breakfast?"

"Oh." Maura chuckles and is straddling my hips with one smooth move, having a playful glint in her eyes.

I smile slyly and my hands find their way automatically to her very own hips. Who cares about Olivia Wilde when Dr. Maura Isles is sitting on top of you? Certainly not me! Olivia who? I am quite surprised that my wife is currently wearing a shorty pajama. She even could wear a garbage bag and she still would breathtaking. To be fair, she is wearing a pj's that I wouldn't even consider to buy, I even wouldn't take a look at it.

I let my hands wander over her thighs and have to lick my dry lips as my eyes roam over her torso.

She has a mischievous smile on her lips as she leans forward. "Do you like what you see?" She whispers into my ear.

I swallow back a groan and shiver violently. I don't know why but she has effects on me no one else ever had before. "I love what I am seeing." I husk and turn my head a little to catch her eyes. I can see her smile and my heart is skipping a beat. My hands find their way on her back as soon as she connects our lips and sigh in relieve. It is slow and sweet, and my hips are bucking accidentally as my hands slide down to her butt.

I hear her moan when I squeeze it and I wouldn't mind if I die in this second … Well, maybe I would mind it a little bit, okay, a lot.

Maura is straightening up and gets my hands in her own, guiding them to her front and up until they are cupping her breasts. She bits her bottom lip because I am not capable to swallow back my groan. She gasps as soon as I run my thumbs over her perked buds and rolls her hips unintentionally.

This is a wake-up call I really do not mind and I start to tug at the hem of her tank top. "This needs to go." I order and help her to pull the said top over her head, tossing it to the side. I stop dead as soon as I lay eyes on the exposed torso of my wife and shudder. No matter how many times I see this sight, it always takes my breath away.

I run my hands down her sides and have to swallow hard. "God, you are beautiful." I whisper and my eyes find Maura's once again. I cup her breast again and squeeze them once again.

Maura moans unashamed and capture my lips again. I can tell that she is tired of talking because she rolls her hips all over again.

"Jane, Maura?" Ma's voice is coming from downstairs and I shake my head with a groan. "If we are very quiet maybe she'll go away again." I whisper and whine in the same time.

Maura smiles sympathetic and is about to continue our foreplay, but Ma is calling our names again and we both know that the moment is over. She huffs and straightens up once more.

I make a pouty face and place my hands on my wife's hips.

"Maura, Jane?"

"For the love of God, **Ma**." I bark at the top of my lungs and Maura chuckles because we are sure that Ma has heard me. "Has it occurred to you that we are still in bed?"

Maura is laughing now and climbs out of our bed. "Jane," she says softly and put her tank top back on.

I groan and prop myself up on my elbow, eyebrows furrowed. "Do you have to work today, Maura?"

She turns back to me and shakes her head. "Jane, it is Saturday. I don't have to work at Saturdays."

"Do you have plans?"

"Not really, but I thought that you would have to work."

I put my hands behind my head and shrug. "No, not today. Today I am all yours. Can I interest you in a bike trip to Cape Cod?"

Maura is raising her eyebrows high and I can see the small around her lips. "Really?"

I smile as well and nod. My smile grows wider as soon as she presses her lips to mine and I know she indeed likes my proposal.

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I am focused on the free road as I look through the cover of my helmet and have to smile as my wife wraps her arms tighter around my middle as I maneuver us into a sharp right-hand bend. I know that Maura is trusting me unconditionally and that she knows that I would never make some crazy maneuvers when she is with me, and that I don't drive with 125 mph through the streets when she is with me. Well, I do it when I am alone on my bike, but that doesn't matter right now.

I halt the bike at a small parking lot and kill the engine, taking my helmet down and enjoying the view of the beach and the ocean for a second. I arch an brow as soon as my lovely wife steps into my sight after she got rid of her very own helmet, smiling broadly. "What?" I ask and lean a little forward, propping my elbows on my helmet now.

Maura is smiling broadly and shrugs. "It's been a while since we had been at a beach together."

I furrow my brows and eye her with faked skepticism. "Have you been at the beach with someone else since we are together?"

She scoffs and kisses me gently. It is full of love and promises. "Don't be ridiculous, Jane."

I smile broadly and get off my bike and taking off the jacket of my motorcycle gear. I am glad that Maura is okay with it that I only wear a part of the protection gear today. Well I am a little surprised about that. I wrap my left arm around her shoulders and she does the same with hers just around my middle. I start to lead the way towards the said beach and scowl at a older couple who is giving us a disapproving look.

We may live 21th century, but some people still haven't arrived in it yet. I inhale deeply the ocean smell and try to relax a bit after Maura has pulled me even closer. She has seen the look as well, but somehow she always reacted way calmer than I do. Maybe it is because I am the very first woman she has been with and that she hasn't to go through all the things I had to go through.

"Don't react on that," she whispers and smiles up at me. "It doesn't matter what others are thinking, Jane. All that matters right now is you and me, being here together."

I take a deep breath and frown a little. She is absolute right, how can I let glances from some idiots run such a beautiful day that I am spending with the love of my life? It is a opportunity that will be rare while I am working undercover. I flop down in front of a small dune and tug on Maura's hand. I smile wryly because she is hesitating before she sits down in between my legs. I place my chin on her left shoulder and kiss her cheek. "When all of this is over, we have to come here more often." I whisper and nudge the side of her head with my nose.

Maura is smiling broadly but doesn't tear her eyes away from the landscape. "Definitely," she agrees.

I, on the other hand, can't tear my eyes away from her and am mesmerized by her profile. Hell, I think I am falling for her all over again, and even harder. If that is possible.

She starts to snicker and frowns a little. "Jane, you are staring."

I can't help the broad smile that is spreading over my face and shrug. "I am allowed to stare at you."

"That's a little creepy." She laughs and I join her.

I take a deep breath and look directly into hazel eyes. God, those eyes are going to be the death of me, as well as the woman they belong to. "I love you so much, Maura." I say all of a sudden.

She is holding my gaze and I can see all kind of emotions in her eyes. She leans in a little and her lips are grazing mine as she says, "I love you too, Jane."

I smile broadly before I kiss her long and gentle.


	13. Chapter 13

**Hey guys, I am so sorry for the long delay and I hope that it won't take that long anymore before I update this story again. I hope that you still stick with this story and that you're gonna like this chapter.**

 **And I want to thank you for reading, following and that you favorited this one.**

 **As always you can share your thoughts.**

 **Enjoy,**

 **T73.**

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I'm sitting at the dining table of Maura's and my home and stew over my handwritten notes, which really frustrates me because it feels like my team and I don't get anywhere for months. And sitting today sitting here, in my own home, feels kinda strange to me.

After I told Frankie and Korsak in a drunken state about the cars, which are standing every now and then in our streets, they and Cavanaugh decided that it'll be best for all of us if I rent a apartment and stay as far away from my wife as possible. As you can imagine, Maura wasn't really thrilled about that, and neither was my mother. Not to mention that I'd argued heartedly that it would be unnecessary and that everything's under control. I really tried to convince my partners and my boss that I don't need to move out and get even more lost in a world of intrigue, drugs and even worse. But it's hard to do so if you don't really believe it yourself.

It was never my intention to risk Maura's or my family's well-being, but being a cop on a undercover operation unfortunately can bring those you love dearly into the line of fire if you are too close to them. You put a target on their backs inadvertently if you stay too close to them during such a assignment.

That's why I consented to move into a apartment that is assigned to my alias. That was a month ago. Believe me, I did it to keep Maura and my mother safe. I could never forgive myself if something happens to one of them. I really try to keep them safe and I know deep down in their hearts they know that as well, but there isn't a moment they give me a hard time if I'm around.

I really hate those operations, and in the same time I thank them because the last time I went undercover, I met my beautiful wife. But being away from Maura makes everything really hard for me.

The apartment I'm living in six days of a week doesn't feel like home. It's cold and sparsely furnished. It has a desk, a dining table, some cheap ,a bed, a couch, a TV and my laptop but no Maura, and no Ma.

I never thought that I would miss Ma just as much as Maura, but … what shall I say … I'm a family person.

I sigh and run my left hand through my hair, closing my tired eyes. I sneaked into the house quite lately and decided against going upstairs and into the king-size bed. I had to force myself to stay downstairs and to rest on the couch.

Yes, rest. I didn't sleep, I just enjoyed the atmosphere of being home. I didn't go up to the bedroom because I know that Maura's mad at me, that she's not happy with the whole situation. I know it because we're talking every night on the phone and at some point her voice always becomes … clinical. Like she's reading me a autopsy report, and that hurts even me.

Every time we talk on the phone I tell her how much I love her and that I'm doing this to make the city better and that I don't really want to be away from her, but being away doesn't make me credible for real.

I know that my wife's aware of the fact that I am home because she came down to get a glass of water last night, and I know that she saw me laying on the couch. Well, we looked at each other, but she got upstairs without saying a word.

You can say that we have a little marital crisis right now, I just hope that it won't get worse.

God, I don't think that I could handle that at all. I liked a couple of women before Maura and I bumped into each other, but I never loved them like I love Maura. And right now I really miss her, not only emotionally but also physically. I want to hold her in my arms after a hard day of work, I want to kiss her and tell her how much I love her and I want to make love to her. I simply want to feel at home. And currently, that's impossible.

I don't know why, but she has power over me no one ever had before.

I still remember the day we met for the very first time and thought **Wow, I need to get to know her because this woman's gonna be the love of my life**. And that's what she is, the love of my life. God knows where I'd be today without her.

My eyes flutter open when I feel an hand resting on my shoulder and I look up into hazel eyes I got used to love. Eyes which tell me that everything's gonna be alright and that we'll get through this.

I release my breath when Maura starts to caress my cheek before she runs her hand through my hair like I did before, and I have to fight to keep my eyes open. I place my hands on her hips and pull her gently closer. I want to tell her how much I miss her and that I'm sorry for all of this, but there aren't enough words in this world to put my emotions into. I wrap my arms tightly around her waist and place my head on her belly. I hold onto her like my life depends on her, like she's my lifeline. No, she **is** my life line.

Feeling her body against mine reminds me why I'm doing this. Because other people also have their very own version of Maura who needs to be protected, who needs to be safe. And families who needs someone like me to bring them justice.

Maura sighs and scrutinize my face for what feels like minutes before she asks, "When was the last time you had a real breakfast?"

I have to scoff because she asks it like the last time she has seen me was two days ago. I ease my hold and shrug. Honestly, I haven't been thinking about breakfast since I'm sitting here, all I could think of was Maura kissing me. "Kiss me and I'll be fine," I say with a hopeful smile.

She smiles at me and complies. She kisses me softly and my heart skips a beat, knowing that she's not mad but glad to see me in one piece. She pulls away and runs the tip of her fingers along my jawline, studying my face. "How does scrambled eggs, bacon and coffee sound?"

"Perfect," I answer and I mean it. I know, it's nothing special and I am surprised that she offers it without lecturing me about my eating habits. It sounds perfect because I am at home and having breakfast with Maura.

I even would eat spinach right now without complaining, and I can tell you. It's not one of my favorite unless it's creamed.

She smiles broadly and kisses me once more before I drop my hands and get up to my feet.

"What are you doing," she asks me confused.

I turn her around and put my hands back on her hips, pushing her gently in the direction of our kitchen and kissing her neck. "I'll help you."

Maura chuckles and tilts her head to the side, giving me more access. "I think this has nothing to do with breakfast."

No, this has nothing to do with breakfast but I'm really craving for her. I loose the belt of her dressing gown and I take a second to take in the sight in front of me. Jesus, even in a plain nightie Maura looks like a goodness. Well, to be honest, even a potato bag would great at her. I can tell that Maura knows that right now I have something totally different in mind then food because I can hear her inhaling sharply. I let my eyes roam over her body and have to swallow a growl. All I can do is to whisper, "Jesus, is there anything that doesn't look breathtaking on you?" I don't give Maura the time to answer and press my lips to hers, slowly pushing the gown off her shoulders. I am beyond glad that she doesn't protest or even push me away. Instead she moans and wraps her arms around my neck. I sweep our dining table with my left hand clean and push my wife against the edge of the table. It's evident that we both need this. Time for us alone, time in which we are close again. If it wouldn't be so, Maura would start her lecture about this being insanitary and this is a place where our family sits together and eat.

I want to push one strap down to get started, but I hear that someone opens the front door without knocking or ringing the doorbell and am alarmed immediately. Jumping away from Maura, I automatically reach for my gun that isn't at my hip and I frown. Great, I want to keep my family safe and doesn't have my service weapon within reach. I turn around and shield my wife with my own body. Whoever comes after her right now has to get past me.

I stare into familiar eyes and my protectiveness is replaced by frustration and anger instantly. "For Chrissake," I say out loud and take a step forward. "I could have shoot you. Why don't you knock or ring the doorbell, Ma? Or at least call before you come by."

My mother looks at me like I've lost my mind completely before she walks past me. I can feel her own anger and my shoulders slump. "How could I have known that you decided to spend the night with your wife." She snaps and places a grocery bag on the surface of the kitchen island, glaring at me. "And it's not like you're answering your phone if I'm calling. God forbid, I could be worried about my only daughter and want to check on her." She says and my chin drops to my chest. "And besides, Maura and I agreed to have breakfast together."

I turn my head to Maura and she actually do look like she has forget about it and she mouths _I'm so sorry_. I sigh and know that I have to soften my tone. Of course Ma is worried about me and of course she keeps company with Maura while I'm away. Maura places an hand on my back and it feels like she tells me that we still have the rest of the day for ourselves, the morning can be spend with Ma. We survived weeks without any kind of intimacy, we'll survive some more hours. I give in and sigh, rounding the counter and kissing the cheek of my mother. "I'm sorry, Ma. I should have been the one who's calling."

She tries to keep an angry face but in her eyes I can see that she's glad to see her only daughter is still alive and in one piece. "Yes, you should have." She says firmly and unpacks the bag, but then she turns to me and scrutinize my face. "You look tired."

Maura smiles broadly and walks to us, starting the coffee maker without saying a word.

I roll my eyes but can't help the smile that find its way on my face. "It's a very exhausting case, Ma."

"Isn't it always." She shoots back and quirks an eyebrow.

"It's over soon." I lie and try to smile sweetly at her.

Ma scoffs and looks briefly at my wife. "Why don't you sit down and I'll make a proper breakfast for all of us. I want to spend some time with you before you disappear into nowhere again."

I know that it is best to comply instead of arguing with my mother right now, and a real homemade breakfast won't hurt at all. Being the real me for a couple of hours can do good after pretending to be someone else day in and day out.

I squeeze my mother's shoulder and then I help Maura to set the table. We smile every now and then at each other and I know that this is going to be a good day.


	14. Chapter 14

I smile and run my fingers Maura's bare back up and down. After Ma made breakfast for us we had been forced to spend the day with her and at some point I was so stressed by her that I decided that I shouldn't be the only one who's tortured by my overbearing mother. So I called Frankie. I think he will never forgive me that.

No, seriously. All of us enjoined the little get together and Frankie and I needed some time with her and Maura. All of us needed it. Ma made her famous lasagna and I wouldn't have mind if I die right then and there. Now, laying next to Maura is everything I need and it remembers me why I'm doing this. It's not just because I want to bring some assholes of corrupt cops down, I also do this to keep my family safe. Since those said cops decided to threaten me by shadowing my wife, it became personal. And if some wannabe gangster thinks it would browbeaten me that they sent people after me ... I'm sorry it just pisses me off even more. And to be honest, I'm silently hoping that one of my **colleagues** shoe up at one of the illegal street races so I can strangle them with my bare hands. Not just because they have betrayed everything police officers are standing for, but also because they dared to come to my home and intimidated my family. No one does that. I don't give a fuck if it blows my cover as long as one of them is behind bars. Perhaps it will help and that person drops a dime on their boss.

I sigh and frown a little as Maura starts to stir. Damn, I didn't mean to wake her. She turns her head and opens her eyes, blinking sleepily. "What time is it?"

I don't need to look at the clock. "A quarter to five," I answer and tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. I know that it won't take long until she gets out of the bed and starts her morning routine. That's why I want to enjoy the last fifteen minutes that we have left to go. I don't know when I'll be home the next time and I need something good to hold onto until then.

"You're leaving again, aren't you," Maura asks and turns on her left side so she can look at me.

I drop my eyes to her exposed breasts and pout when she covers them with the sheet. So much about something good to hold onto. I nod once and smile a little. "Yes." I admit and my heart breaks when I see her expression, but it is better if I leave before sunrise.

"When are you coming back home?"

"I don't know, Maura." I answer and close my eyes as she graps the sheet and gets out of the bed. I groan loudly and roll onto my back. "Maura, come on. You knew that my visit would be temporarily."

"I didn't know that our marriage would be based on this," she hisses and disappears in our bathroom. "You should have told me that before so I could think twice about your proposal."

Wait, what? She would have think twice about my proposal? My frown deepens and I blink a couple of times. Her words feel like she just slapped me in the face and turned my proposal down. No, that's a understatement. It feels like that I've been hiding my true personality and what I'm doing for a living, and that she just found out that I'm a cop. I mean, I told her at the beginning that I'm a Homicide detective, I just didn't tell her that I know as undercover when we met for the first time. And I didn't know that I would go undercover once again. I think I missed that detail before I took the job. I get out of the bed, put on my sweats and my shirt and follow Maura into the belathroom. "You sound like I lied to you the entire time. You knew that I'm a cop when we started dating. You knew that I'm a cop when I proposed to you, and you knew it when we got -"

"I know," she cuts me off and turns to me with tears in her eyes. "I know, Jane. But I didn't know that I'd barely see you."

"That's a part of the job, Maura. I mean, your job isn't like you come home at five in the evening either."

"But I come home every day." She shoots back and her voice somehow sounds resigned. "And I don't pretend to be someone whom I am not, day in, day out. I have been thinking that I'd come home and find myself in your arms, that we'd be there for each other, no matter what time of day. But I am alone, Jane. Every time I come home it feels like -" Maura pauses and wips the tears, that escaped from her eyes without permission, off her cheek. "I feel lonely, Jane. I don't feel like I'm in a marriage anymore."

I stare blankly at Maura and I can feel who my heart is ripped out of my chest. I hold my breath and frown. Korsak told me a hundred times how his ex-wives broke the news that they want to have a divorce, and know I have the same talk as well. I really love Maura, that's why I don't know why I give up so easily. "You want a divorce?"

Maura's wincing at my words and closes her eyes in the same moment like she's struggling with her answer. "I need to figure out what I want right now, Jane. I ... I need time to figure out what I want. "

What just happened? Last night, Maura and I couldn't get enough of each other and loved us for hours, and now we're standing here and talk about having a divorce. It's like I've entered a parallel universe after Maura opened her eyes. I frown as a thought cross my mind. "Are you seeing someone else?"

She huffs angrily and turns away from me. "Don't be ridiculous, Jane."

Her answer angers me and I think that my suspicion is confirmed. I growl low and step closer to her. "Are you, Maura."

"I'm not going to answer that."

"Maura -"

"No, I am not. But what is going on between you and CJ?"

My heart drops and I literally can feel how the color drains from my face. "What?"

She licks her lips before she once again turns around to look at me. "You've heard me, Jane. What is going on between you and CJ?"

My mouth became dry and my heart's hammering against my sternum. "Nothing's going on. She's just a friend who's helping me to finally end all of this."

Maura scoffs and her eyes are icy, just like her voice. "Just friends. Friends don't French kiss each other."

My eyebrows shoot up high and I have to swallow my growl. I know what she's talking about and only one person knows about that slip. And I'm going to kill Frankie for telling Maura about it. I search for a good explanation but I can't come up with one. I don't even know why, really. I clench my teeth and hope that my wife doesn't take my silence the wrong way, but her face tells me that she gets the wrong idea and steps away from me when I try to reach out for her. I drop my hand again and I can tell that this discussion is over already. I don't even know why she doesn't give me the chance to explain myself right now. Okay, she's mad because I have forgotten to mention that CJ's my **girlfriend** while I'm at work, but I didn't bring it up because I know that Maura isn't very fond of CJ. Well, I can understand it, no matter how many times I tell CJ to stop her flirting, she intensives it instead.

Maura drops the sheet and quriks an eyebrow. "I would like to take a shower. I have to get ready for work."

I want to protest but decide against it because I don't want to make the whole situation worse. I suppress the urge to huff and turn on my heels. I swear to God, Frankie's a dead man.

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I nearly kick the front door to CJ's autoshop open and want to turn around and leave again because I hear Frankie yelling at something and CJ's giggling. Those are the two persons I really don't wanna see right now. I'm just glad that I don't have my gun on me right now. I swallow a growl and stop dead as soon as I find a yellow Camaro ss standing in the middle of the working area. This ... **thing** reminds me of Bumble Bee in Transformers. Not the cheesy version, the new, cool one that I really would like to have. Besides, the Audi I got from Maura.

If I remember right, this thing wasn't here before the weekend and something tells me that it would be best if the car wouldn't be herr right now. Something tells me that this car has an owner that isn't neither Frankie nor CJ nor me. I drop my duffel bag to the ground and take a closer look at the Camaro. I have to admit, this car is just as nice as my Audi and the cars that are owned by the members of **my** crew. Yes, a lot has changed since I took this undercover assignment. Officially, I am the owner of this autoshop because I needed a authentic background and since the guys know that I'm no longer just **Speedy** , though I'm a little sad that I lost the nickname, I got used to it. But since I am officially leading this shop people take me more serious and come to me if they want CJ and Frankie to take a look ulat their cars. I honestly didn't know that he's such a good car mechanic. Well, if we are honest, he sucks as a plumbe, who would've expected that he's good with cars. I think working at his bike with Maura did him very good.

I sigh and pick my bag up from the floor, I really die to know how this car found its way to our shop. Entering the break area, I find my brother sitting with CJ on the old leather couch, playing racing game. Really? I just hope that he didn't got his skills from that. I can't swallow my griek anymore and turn off the TV.

"Hey," they say in unison and look accusingly at me.

"Really?" I reply and place the bag on an even older desk, putting my hair into a loose ponytail. I don't know how CJ can sit at that. I glare at my brother and take a deep breath. "Wanna tell me whose Camaro is standing in the garage?"

CJ exchanges a glance with Frankie before she drops her very own gamepad onto the coffee table and gets up to her feet. "It is my Camaro. I didn't use it for a long time and I thought it would be useful for you when Frankie and I have to work at your Audi."

"It's yours," I ask skeptically and qurik an eyebrow as I put my jacket off. "I hope you own it legally?"

Frankie scoffs and looks at her like he's silently telling her _I told you so_.

CJ smiles at me and nods. "Yes, I own it legally. It was my brother's Camaro, to be exact. It needs some maintenance but I can guarantee that this car is one of the fastest I've ever worked with. But if you don't want it -"

I frown and clench my teeth. I am flattered by her gesture, but this is her brother's heritage and I want to be responsible if I smash her Camaro during a race. I'm sure that we're going to find a second Camaro which doesn't mean so much to any of us. "I apprentice this, but I can't take your brother's car. I can't promise that it'll stay in one piece. And ... he gave it to you, CJ. We'll get a similar one."

"That's impossible." She replies and crosses her arms. "This one is personalized. Believe me, you're gonna need it if you want to be respected."

"I thought I already am."

"You'll need it if you want to keep your good record."

I can't argue with that and sigh. "We'll talk about that later." My eyes land on Frankie and I can feel how my face darkens. "We have to talk."

"Talk," he says almost insubordinately and I swear I wanna shoot him.

CJ gets the hint and clears her throat. "I ... um ... I go and check on the Camaro."

I wait until she's gone and growl low "Why did you tell Maura about the kiss?"

"What kiss?"

"Frankie!"

He sighs and gets up from the couc. He walks to the fridge in which we keep our drinks cool and takes a bottle of water out of it. "I didn't tell Maura about your slip. Why would I do that?" He pauses when he sees my face and takes a sip of his drink. "Come on, Janie. You know me better. I don't know who told Maura about the kiss. But she came to me last night and asked me if something more happened between you and CJ. I asked her who told her about it too but she didn't answer. Why should I do that to you, Jane? I think the two of you are prefect for each other."

I look long at him and guilt is creeping up in me. He's right, he doesn't have any reason to bring Maura and me apart. He likes her but more like his sister. I furrow my brows and lick my lips. "But only you and Frost know about it."

"And CJ."

"Yeah." I agree and suddenly I feel very sick. I take a moment and start to doubt that any of my confidence told Maura about that damn kiss. Of course, CJ would have many reasons to do so, but that doesn't sound like her. Frost and Frankie are family and they wouldn't do something like that at all. And then there are the uniformed who are -

"You and Maura are okay?"

"Not at all," I answer truthfully with a sigh and nod in the direction of the working area. "Let's go and see if we can help CJ."

He nods and follows me without a comment.


	15. Chapter 15

**Guys, thank you for all your support and your kind words. I really hope that you'll like this chapter. And you're, as always, welcome to tell me what you think.**

 **Enjoy,**

 **T73**

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CJ has told me that the Camaro probably needs some overhauls because she can't remember the last time that she has taken it out of the garage. She didn't drive the Camaro because it holds too many memories of her brother. I'm not quite sure if I should feel flattered or if I should worry about that. It doesn't really matter right now, I have to worry about other things. I wipe my hands on the overall I'm wearing and take a take a deep breath before opening the hood of the car. I know that makes a lot sense wiping my hands clean before I get them dirty again. I take a closer look at the engine and can't contain a whistle. This quite impressive. I can see a high-end catalyzer, turbo charger and all kind of goodies, but I can't see any parts that need to be repaired. In a nutshell, this car is a beast.

"Holy shit," my brother says and I turn my head to look at him. "This is awesome."

"I know," I agree and heave a sigh. I close the hood again as soon as I hear the bell that's hanging over the shop door.

A man comes in and takes a pair of sunglasses off his nose. He is in the age of 35 years. He has a pale complexion, wavy light brown hair worn long, and brown eyes. He is tall, of average weight, and is dressed in a pair of jeans and a red shirt.

Somehow I can tell that he isn't the usual kind of costumer and his Ford Mustang in front of the shop confirms my suspicion. I wipe my hands in my pants once again and start to round the Camaro, my senses are alarmed already. "Hi. What can I do for you," I ask and can feel Frankie standing behind me.

The stranger eyes me from head to toe and a cocky smile appears on his lips. "You must be Jane."

I don't smile back, and I don't let him humiliate me by his hungry eyes. I cross my arms and nod once. "I am. And you are?"

His eyes suddenly look past me and his whole demeanor changes. "CJ." He simply says and scoffs. "I should have known that you're behind all of this."

What the fuck? I look over my shoulder just to see CJ standing in the door. Her face doesn't give her away, but her eyes are despisingly. "What are you doing here, John," she asks and even I can hear the bitterness in her voice. Something tells me that it's not just because they know each other, something tells me that there's a reason why her dislike is deeply rooted. Normally I would ask what's the matter, but that would blow my cover.

He smiles cockily. "It's been a while the last time I've seen you."

"Unfortunately not long enough," she shoots back.

I clear my throat and step automatically forward, using my body to shield her from any harm. "So, now that we know each other. What do you want, **John**?"

He chuckles and shoves his hands into the pockets of his expensive jeans. "My boss would like to see if you're really as good as everyone says. Personally, I think that the people are only exaggerating, but my oppinion doesnt mean much to my boss. He wanna see it himself." He pauses and steps closer to us. "I, for myself, think it's a waste of time and of money, but I already told ya that it doesn't matter what I'm thinking."

Yes, I already understood that the first time, and I really do believe him. No one gives a damn what he's thinking. Got it. I shift my weight from one foot to the other and sigh impatiently. "Get down to brass tacks, would you." I state because I think that he's an wannabe gangster and that he's just wasting my time, but I've never been a very patient person.

John blinks a couple of times and seems to be surprised by my words. Maybe he isn't used that someone talks to him like that. His face turns dark and he huffs. "My boss offers you ten grand if you beat me tonight."

I quirk an eyebrow and it's my turn to smile cockily. "I can beat the daylights out of you here and now, if you want me to. No problem." I reply and I mean it. He annoys me that much that I want to break his nose right now. And getting ten grand for that ... That's a nice bonus.

He scoffs but his eyes tell me that I, as well, annoy him. "At a street race, tonight."

Damn, and I thought I would have fun already. But ten grand is still a offer I can't turn down if I want to keep up my appearances. And beating this dickhead at a race can't be that hard, right?

I turn the corners of my mouth downward and wiggle my brows, pretending that I'm considering his offer. "Deal."

"Make it fifteen grand and I'm in too." CJ suddey says and steps in front of me.

"What," I say with an high-pitched voice and I'm sure the color is draining from my face.

John bares his his teeth in the attempt to smirk and my stomach turns. " **That's** a deal."

I think I must have missed something, perhaps the part in which CJ became a active part in all of this. "No," I say and shove her back behind me. "No, that's no deal. That's not going to happen. Either it's just you and me or nothing at all."

"Then it's nothing at all." He says and starts to turn. "I knew that you're a chicken. My boss will be very disappointed, and upset. And you don't want to upset him."

I glare at CJ and chew on the inside of my cheek. Well, all of this can go belly-up and then everything was just a waste of time. And I know that I can't always protect CJ, and it also isn't my job. She can take of herself fairly good, that's what she did in the past and that's what she gonna have to do in the future.

I press my lips together and turn my attention back to John. "Fine, she's in as well." I say through gritted teeth and he looks at me with a smile that makes me shiver.

"All right," he says and thrusts his chin at her. "I'll send you the address where the race takes place. Don't be too late."

I wait until John is gone again and drop my chin to my chest, closing my eyes. I wonder what else can go wrong today. I swear to God, I want to turn back time to the moment when I decided to go undercover once again, and I want to make this decision undone. Then I could sit at my place with my wife and enjoy Maura's company. Instead, I am here and to keep struggling with CJ and the entire situation.

I feel anger bubbling up and I pierce her with my gaze, then I grab her at her arm and drag her into the small office that neither of us is really using, slamming the door shut. "What the hell was that," I ask louder and I want shake her because she just hunch her shoulders.

I clench my jaw and close my eyes once again to compose myself, putting my hands on my hips. I huff and shake my head because I feel like I'm talking to a five-year old who's about to get grounded. I raise my eyes again and step closer to her. " **My** job is to risk my damn life, day in, day out. **Your** job is to keep the damn cars rolling and to keep me in this scene." I know myself too well and know that I can't keep my voice calm for long. " **I** **don't know what the hell happened between you and Johnny Boy, and I don't give a fuck, all right.** " I say and my voice raises more and more. See? I told you that I'm not very good at keeping my temper at bay. " **It is my job to keep you, and Maura, and Frankie, and Frost and Korsak alive. And you have nothing else to do than to buy yourself into a race that probably turns out bad? Without consultation with me? How the hell am I supposed to keep you safe,killed? What shall I tell my boss when you're getting injured, or even worse, killed**?"

She doesn't lose eye contact and even dares me. "Are you more worried about me or the fact that you could lose your contact person, Jane," she asks me back and I look at her like she just slapped me in the face. "I got along pretty well even without you, and that won't change after you returned to your normal life, you don't have to take care of me. Or to protect me, I'm a big girl."

"Then act like one and cancel your attendance."

" **Stop pretending that you care for me, all right**." She suddenly yells at me, throws her hands up and turns her back to me. " **For Heaven's sake, stop pretending that you care for me, Jane. I can't take that anymore. You act like you know me. You act like we became best friends in the short amount of time we know each other. You ... YOU know nothing about me. Absolutely NOTHING**!"

My eyebrows shoot up high and I look in disbelief at her. I don't know why her words are pissing me off even more and I feel the muscles in my face twitch. She's right I don't know her enough to make decisions for her, but it's not true that I don't care for her at all. And I know that she's willed to risk her life for some silly reason. Maybe to prove that she doesn't need anyone, or just because she's sick of life. Put I won't let it happen that she gets herself killrd, not on my watch. I growl low and step closer, shoving my index finger into her chest. "Don't you dare saying that I don't care about you." I say warningly and I can see that something's happening in CJ. "I care for you like your my sister. I ride for a fall here, CJ. And I need all the help I can get, I need you to help me. Which is impossible when you're gone. And -" I trail off and drop my hand. "And I could never forgive myself if something happens to you. I don't know what happened between you and this John guy, but whatever this is, don't let it cloud your judgement. You're a good person, CJ, and you are anything but alone. If you don't believe me, go and ask Frankie. He'll tell you the same thing."

She squints up at the ceiling and swallows hard, wiping a single tear off her cheek that escaped from her eye without her permission. "John was the reason why my brother never really got out of the racer scene." She says with a breathy voice, shaking her head."Every time I was able to convince him to fink out, John showed up with all kind of muscle cars so my brother work on them. And before I knew it Enrico was driving the next race. And now I have the chance to get revenge for that."

I take a deep breath and nod slowly, placing my hands on her shiulders. "Even though you are able to make John look like a fool, it won't bring your brother back."

She nods as well and licks her lips. "I know that, Jane. But as much as you care for me as much I care for you, and I know John way better than you do. I can kill two birds with one stone when I help you. I didn't do it just for me, I also do it for Maura. I know that John plays foul. And I really can sleep better when I know that I had your back. I couldn't help my brother, but I can help you, Jane. And in the same time, I can embarrass John."

I sigh loudly and furrow my eyebrows. Somehow I know that she's right and that I can need any help that I get. And she's right, I don't know anything about wannabe gangster John. I don't know what kind of car he's driving and I don't know anything about his driving. So, if CJ says that he plays foul, it has to be true. And something tells me that this offer doesn't come from the head of Johnny's racing crew. Maybe that's what I need to close this damn case once and for all.

I sigh once again and still nod. "Okay," I agree in a whisper and look into her eyes. "Okay, you're right. I know absolutely nothing about John, and I know nothing about his driving." I stop and frown deeply. "But you won't do anything stupid that put your life at risk. Do you hear me?"

CJ nods and a smile tugs on her lips. "Loud and clear."

I pat her shoulder and nod to the closed door. "All right, let's get your brother's Camaro working."

"No need, I have the perfect car for this race."

I open the said door and catch Frankie's skeptical look. I warn him and quirk an brow. "Your very own?"

"My very own," she agrees and glances at my brother. "Come on, Frankie. We still have a lot to do. We don't want thats Jane's Audi flood already at the starting line, do we?"

He still looks at me and mumbles, "No, we don't."

I lick my lips and close the door again because I really need some time for myself.

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I have absolutely no idea for how long I'm sitting in the uncomfortable chair in the office and think about the things that went wrong the last couple of days, and what could go wrong tonight.

I have planned to sneak into my real home later and to talk Maura about everything, but because of my stupid mouth I can kiss that plan goodbye. Sometimes it's really better to think twice before you speak. I sigh heavily and rub my face with both of my hands. I look up as soon as someone places an expensive briefcase on the desk and furrow my brows as my eyes trails up a body I know by heart.

I finally stop at hazel eyes and blink a couple of times. It feels like I haven't done that for the last hours. In the same time my heart feels relieved because my wife is standing in front of me. But ... Maura shouldn't be here at all. And gone is the feeling again. "What are you doing here, Maura?"

Maura's face is unreadable and scoffs humorlessly. "It's good to see you too."

I can't contain a groan and lean back in the chair. "I'm sorry, Maura." I reply and shake my head. I reach out for her hand and am surprised that she takes mine without hesitance. I guide her around the said desk and have to smile because I can see that she's out of square with the hygienics of this place. I look up at Maura as soon as she steps between my legs and my eyes fall shut as soon as she runs her fingers over my cheeks. I want to pull her closer but doesn't do so because she's wearing one of her favorite outfits. No, not only her favorite, also mine.

'You look tired, " she says softly and I'm the one who scoffs now. She eases the lines ony forehead and I swear that my heart is breaking and melting in the same time.

I really have absolutely no idea how I deserved a woman with such a good heart like Maura has but I feel blessed. Not many men or women would be so understandable like she is. I have seen many officers who has been left by their spouses because of the job, and mine has been damn close to that too. Yes, Maura can get pretty mad but she never bear grudges. I really don't know how she's doing that, maybe it has to do with her yoga-thingy. "I'm tired, Maura. I'm so, so tired." I admit in a whisper but don't dare to open my eyes, I'm too afraid that I just imagine this moment and that it'll be over when I open them. "I wanted to come home tonight. Have dinner with you, sit with you on the couch, maybe watch a movie with you. I just want to be with you, being a normal couple."

She doesn't say anything right now and I'm worrird, but then she says, "Then come home, honey. Come home to me."

Now, I open my eyes and am relieved that she's still here with me, that my mind didn't trick me. I swallow hard and tilt my head to the side. "I wish I could." I croak and can't swallow down the lump in my throat. "I ... I ... I took a job for tonight." I spot the disappointment in her eyes and hate myself. "I ... I didn't think twice, Maura. Maybe ... this is the key in the case. All I could think of was that I want to close this case and to come home back to you. And then a man named John showed up and told me that his boss wants to see my skills as driver. How could I say no?"

Maura looks down at me and nods, tracing the contours of my face with the tip of her fingers. "Is all of this almost done," she asks and frowns. "Neither Frost nor Korsak give me any information about the progress. So, is it almost over?"

I know that they don't tell her anything in particular, I asked them not to, and Cavanaugh ordered that everything stays just between us. God, I wish I could answer with yes. Instead, I decide to tell her the truth. Remember? Lying didn't do me any good. I sigh and lick my dry lips. "I hope so, Maura."

She nods slowly and bends her head down, but then she stops as our lips are only inches apart and smiles slyly at me. "Is it safe to kiss you right now?"

I don't know what has changed since this morning and I don't give a fuck right now. Maybe she had a talk with my mother. However, sometimes I hate that she's such a tease and put my hand on the back of her neck, pulling her down. "Hell, yeah." I growl and my eyes drop to her lips. I don't care that all of this could blow my cover. Shit happens, even the best of us fail sometimes.

I am good, maybe I am even almost as good as Korsak, but I also have to think about my family, he doesn't. I close the gap of our lips and can't contain a moan. All right, Maura have had sex last night, but that doesn't mean that I have to stop longing for her and her touches. And that her hands are running down my torso doesn't change that. If she don't stop that, I lift her onto CJ's desk and take her here and now. The poor girl perhaps burns it after it, but even about that I don't care.

My eyes roll to the back of my head as soon as Maura starts to kiss down my neck and her hand between my legs doesn't make it any easier. The only thing I can think about right now is ... **that I hate that both of us are still dressed**.

I swallow hard and groan as she continues, and lean back even more. Thank God, I'm no man. She's killing me already now, not to imagine -

"You like that?" Maura cuts my thoughts off and bites my bottom lip lightly.

I groan once again and look with a slight frown at her. "Jesus, I love everything you do to me." I croak and swallow hard.

"Maura, you're ready to - Oh God!"

I glare at Korsak and he turns his back to us.

I whimper because she withdrals her hand from where I need it the most and growl as soon as I see Maura's devilish look. I'll kill Korsak for barging in without knocking.

"More to come," she whispers into my ear and bits its lobe. She straightens up and smiles innocently at him. "I'm good to go."

I can't believe what I'm hearing. Did she - I start to smirk and look long at my wife, who's smiling as well. I know exactly what she did. She made sure that I remember to whom I belong, and I think that my reaction showed her that I never forgot that.

I run my fingers over my lips and fix Maura with my eyes. A growl rumbles from my chest when she smirks at me.

Korsak clears his throat. "Frost and Frankie ask for you."

I fold my hands in front of my mouth and nod slowly. I guess they're longer here then I noticed. "I'll be out in a minute."

He nods and closes the door behind him and Maura.

I stare at the said door and press my lips together. To be honest, I don't need any kind of distraction before the race with John, and then Maura comes in and I'm distracted at all. She's the motivation to get this done, the motivation to become my real me again.

I take a deep breath and heave myself to my feet.

I still have a job to do, right?

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The night is dark and clouds are rising up against heaven ominously. Somehow like its trying to tell that this night won't end good.

I grab the steering wheel of my Audi painfully and for the first time I want to cancel a race. I don't know why, but even the audience seems to have a worrisome atmosphere.

I shake the thought off and study each of the onlookers' faces. So far I can't see a cop who shouldn't be there, which means nothing. But then I stop breathing as soon as I see Maura and Korsak in between the crowd. I tell myself that it's impossible because they shouldn't know anything about this race and that we're taking this race at a abandoned road. No one knows where we are.

I take a deep breath and close my eyes. Good thing that I know nearly each alley, street and road of this damn town. I grew up here, it's my town. You've gotta be better than me to beat me.

God damn, I wish that this would be just a game. No one would get hurt, just pissed.

Yes, I'm a big mouth, but mostly I play on the safe side.

I shake my head and frown when John Boy stops next to me in his Mustang. I make a face and ask myself why CJ put me in a Audi. Now it hits me pretty hard, she's manipulating the race on her own way, and fair.

I want to kill her!

Maybe my car isn't as good as theirs, but I won't be responsible for two peoples' death. I give a damn about my reputation in the racing scene. I look to my left as soon as I hear a angry roar and frown. **Especially if CJ's showing up in her Ford!**

I know that this is going to end badly if I don't stop this, that's the reason why I kill my engine and get out if the car. I can hear disapproving shoutings and whistles that comes from the onlookers who probably don't have the balls to drive a race on their own. I ignore them and walk straight to Frost and Frankie.

Either of them are looking puzzled at me.

"What are you doing, Jane?" Frost whispers harshly and frowns deeply.

I don't react on that. I point over my shoulder and furrow my eyebrows. "This race gonna take place without me."

"What," my brother asks in disbelief and steps closer. "Have you lost your mind? Maybe that's our only chance to close this case and bring down corrupt cops. That's why you're doing this, remember?"

"I remember that quite good, Frankie. But I'm not watching how CJ gets herself or someone else killed, or even worse, be responsible for that. I won't take an active part in this race."

Frost groans loudly and drops his arms to his sides.

"Get in your damn car." CJ hisses as soon as she joins us and her eyes and her face are hard.

I purse my lips and wiggle my brows and shake my head. "No."

"What? Why?"

I pull her closer at her arm and glare at her. "I'm not doing this so you can have your personal revenge, CJ. I trusted you that this would be about my job. You want to get yourself or someone else killed? Fine, but include me out."

Now, it's impossible to read her face and she steps even closer. "You think that you're the only one who risk your life, but you are wrong, Jane. I also risk anything just to help you putting dirty cops behind bars. I can't go home to my wife and life a perfect life. You may think that I owe you something for not arresting me the first time we met. You're wrong again, I owe you absolutely nothing. On the contrary, you owe me a hell of favor. Never forget that!" She turns on her heels and stomps to her car. She opens the driver's door and looks pissed at John, who got out of his car as well. "It's just you and me, John. Let's get this done."

He smiles wryly at me and does as CJ told without arguing. It seems like he also wants to settle an outstanding score, and that doesn't ease my bad feeling a little bit.

A war is raging inside me and suddenly my hands become sweaty, and my mouth dry. I don't know him at all, but I can tell that he'll do anything to win this damn race.

A movement in the corner of my eye catches my attention and I turn my head to see what it is. I really can't believe what I'm seeing. My old friend Lucas Cohan. The one I went to Academy, and the one who had my back back in Vice. But tonight he isn't wearing one of his cheap suits or jeans, tonight he's wearing designer clothes that even Maura would call expensive, not to mention the Lexus he's getting out of. Everything yells that he has money, and the girls seem to like that because they're surrounding him immediately.

My brother's jaw drops to the ground and his eyes went huge. "Is that -"

"Yes, it is." I cut him short and clench my jaw.

"Wasn't he -"

"Yes, he was."

Frost is unusually quiet but then he asks, "Do you think Cohan is John's boss?"

I get sick at the thought and have to swallow hard. It'd be easy to answer with yes, but Lucas never has been smart enough to start up that kind of business. He's only a henchman, tops. A henchman with a very good extra income.

I shake my head and lower my eyebroes. "No. No, he isnt, but he's pretty close to the head of this all." I start to head towards my Audi and forget about the disputes earlier this day. If CJ would know with what kind of people she's about to get involved with, even she'd back off. Lucas isn't know for his soft side, I had to cover him a couple of times until I had enough and reported him to IA. I always wondered why Lucas never got fired.

I push the thoughts out of my mind and sit down behind the steering wheel, turning down the window. I'm beyond relieved that CJ does the same and look at her while starting the engine of my car once more. "No matter what you wanna do, stay close to me."

She blinks a couple if times and asks, "What if I'm leading the race?"

"Do anything to keep that position. No matter what happens behind you, you keep going."

"Jane-"

"Do you trust me?"

It seems like CJ doesn't need to think twice and answers, "Yes."

I can't help the small smile. "Good, because I have your back too."

She smiles back at me and turns the window up again.

I smirk and do the same, letting my engine roaring like a lion that's about to go on still hunt. I take a deep breath and focus on the dark road ahead of me, blocking Johnny's car completely out. It's easier for me because it's not the first time that I'm racing CJ and somehow I know all kind of her maneuvers. I chuckle because her Ford jumps impatiently as soon as she steps a little onto the gas pedal. I quirk an eyebrow and close my eyes for a brief moment to focus even more, then I look at the young man who starts a flare, and in the same moment it feels like everything's slowing down. I mean, my breathing, my heartbeat and everything that's happening around me. I am well aware that I and my Audi don't have any chances at the start and that I'll drop behind CJ and John. But I have two advantages. One: I know every street of Boston by heart; two: my cars pretty awesome when it comes to drifting. Curves are my friends, they are my best chance.

I floor the gas pedal as soon as the boy drops the floor and hear loud cheers and whistles, and I'm honestly surprised that I'm taking the lead. I glance into the rearview mirror and can see that CJ and John are already battling for the second place and I don't like the fact that he's coming too close to her. Honestly? I'm tempted to step on the break and interfere that damn quarrel, but I also know that neither CJ nor I could forgive me for doing so. But I also couldn't forgive myself if something happens to her, that's why I step on the break until I'm right between those squabblers.

I look at her and can see the disbelief in her face even though we're speeding, and hunch my shoulders, clenching my jaw. The gas pedal begs my to step onto it but I resist the urge and keep eye contact with CJ for a moment, giving John the chance to take the lead, but he doesn't take it like I expected it.

I honestly don't know what to do right now, I don't want to leave her alone and in the same time I want to kick John's and Lucas' asses. I know, CJ's right. She survived for years without me and she'll be fine without me in the future. I know that it isn't my job to protect her as well, but since the last time, an invisible bond has chained me to her. I feel responsible for CJ and that will never change. I know that she's an criminal but she saved my eyes a lot more times than I saved hers. She's right, she doesn't owe me anything. I owe her a lot more.

I take a deep breath and look once more at her and shift into the next gear as soon as she nods, turning the steering wheel hard to the right.

I am right, my car have its advantages in curves, and I take the lead once more but this time I don't slow down and I don't look into the rearview mirror, I don't need any distractions. Jesus, how many times has CJ ream my ass because I was too laxly. No kidding, that's what she said. That I'm too laxly.

I wait a minute and look do look into the damn rearview mirror, shifting into the next gear as soon as the two cars appears in it. The Audi doesn't protest but gains speed like its been waiting for that command. I don't like the fact that John doesn't make the attempt to pass me, and that he's more focused on CJ. My heart stops as soon as I see him dropping back behind her and I know that nothing good's about to come. I slow the speed but it's already too late.

I can see how John's garzing CJ's tail and all I remember is that she loses control of her Ford and that the car suddenly flies, and then it rolls over, and over and over until it stops at its side.

All I do in that moment is to brake sharply to bring my car to halt, ignoring that John keeps going. I unbuckle my seatbelt and run back to the hissing wreck just to see CJ hanging upside down. Maura's voice tells me not to unbuckle CJ but I ignore her. I ignore all of my senses, honestly. I just want to get her out and into an ambulance. I give a fuck about anything else ... until ... Until I realize that CJ's not breathing and that she's covered in blood, but in the same time she looks relaxed, almost peaceful. "No," I whisper. I know exactly how a person looks when they're gone, I know how a dead person looks. I have no idea why a ambulance's already approaching us, but I welcome it. Maybe they still can help her, right?

I hold CJ close to me and I'm not ashamed that I start to cry. I try to fight off whoever tries to separate me from her until I realize that's a paramedic who tries to help.

Screw the money, screw the fame, screw the entire case.

I just lost a dear friend, and nothing else counts.

I drop my chin to the chest and ball my hands.

Lucas Cohan, you'll regret this!


	16. Chapter 16

**I know, I know, I know. It's short, but I hope you like it anyway. And I am sorry for the delay. Oh, and this is still Fast Lane, former Hunter's Night, I changed the title as well. But it's the same story :) I almost forgot to mention that.**

 **As always, you're welcome to tell me what you think.**

 **Enjoy,**

 **T73**

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I sit at the kitchen island and stare down at my hands. It's already two weeks since CJ's fatal car accident and since we paid her our last respect. With us I mean her close friends that she had hired for me, Frankie, Frost, Korsak and me. The funeral wasn't too big, that's something she wouldn't want to have, and I preferred to respect her wishes.

Since her death, I barely left the house and didn't give a damn about the case. I even didn't went to the station. Just one time I went to Cavanaugh's office, to tell him that I'm off this case. Still, I can see his shocked face and he needed a couple of moments to process my words. Then he more or less stammered the question 'Are you sure'

Oh, hell, I am beyond sure. This case is over, I failed. Nagging thoughts are blaming me because I wasn't able to keep those I love safe. Black cars followed me and Maura back home and all I did was walking up to said car with my gun at ready. Once I saved CJ's sorry as but then she died because of me anyway. It's just a matter of time, then Frankie gets hurt or killed because of me as well. I don't give a damn if I get hurt in the line of duty, but I was never one who forgave herself easily when someone I care about got hurt because of me and my dumbassery.

Since that accident, since CJ died, I barely slept and I barely ate. I always told myself that I was feeling nothing for that little, crazy lady, but I was lying to myself. I haven't had romantic feelings for CJ, but she was like the sister I never had to me. And the worst that can happen to you is losing a beloved family member.

Korsak and Frost are the lucky ones in this, they haven't been working too close with CJ, but her sudden death even affected them.

It is different with Frankie, he has changed too, but he's handling the situation way better than me. Though, it seems like someone took away his smile too.

I ... normally I am not so affected by a 'stranger's' death. I am a Homicide Detective and it's my job to stay objective until I find my first suspect, and even then I dig deeper until I find the true perpetrator.

I don't need to look out any longer, though. I know that corrupted cops are behind of this, and I think that they knew that I got closer to them, that's why they killed my confident. To fire off a warning shot. And it's working ... for now.

But everyone who knows me knows that I'm like a dog with a bone. I don't let go so easily. I just need some time to recover and then I'm back. I just need a break to be there for my wife, my brothers and my mother to gain strength again. And then I'll be chasing those bastards who turned my life upside down, and then I'll call them to account, one way or the other.

I wince a little and turn my head as soon as I feel a hand on my back and look into worried hazel eyes.

I clench my jaw as soon as Maura traces my cheeks with the tips of her fingers and my eyes fall shut. Then I turn on my chair and she steps in between my legs without saying a word. I wrap my arms tightly around her middle and place my right ear right over her heart, listening to her steady heartbeat. It sooth me and I hold her even tighter. My God ... I know that I shouldn't feel that, but I am beyond glad that those people haven't decide to do anything to Maura. If she'd have been the one who got killed because of this stupid assignment ... I'd have swallow my gun the same night. A life without Maura ... That's unthinkable for me. She is my life, she is my family, she is the love of my life.

I look up at her and am unashamed of the tears who slip down my cheeks without my permission.

Maura smiles sadly down at my and runs her fingers through my hair before she bends her head and closes the last gap of our mouths.

The kiss is sweet, and slow, and innocent. It is one to ease the pain and to tell that she's here for me. It tells that she understands and that she won't love me any less just because I couldn't protect someone. And it tells me that she'll support any of my decisions, that she doesn't doubt me, that she still trust me. That she still love me after all.

I pull away and furrow my eyebrows. All I can think of is, "Thank you."

She tilts her head to the side. "For what?"

I haven't realized that I said that out loud, but I won't lie to her or find a excuse for that outburst. "For being you, for being my better side, for supporting me, for accepting me, for loving me."

Her eyes are full of emotions and she starts to caress my cheek with her thumb. "You're welcome."

A laugh errupts from my throat and I love her even more, if that's possible. Jesus, I met this woman during an undercover assignment and I lied to her unashamed in the beginning, and still I have her. I can see us having a bunch of children. She is the one who I will love until my dying breath, no matter if we'll work out until the last day of our lives or not.

I take a deep breath and furrow my brows. "I love you from the bottom of my heart."

She kisses me again and smiles. "And I love you just as much."


	17. Chapter 17

**And this story's back! Wow, that was some kind of writer's block. I am so sorry for this long delay and hope that some of you guys are still with me. Don't worry, this isn't the final chapter, I think there are still one or two left to go. I hope you'll enjoy this update, and as always you're welcome to tell me what you think.**

 **Enjoy,**

 **T73**

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I am well aware that I am about to make a big mistake, perhaps it even blows my cover and the Mastermind behind all of this might get away, but I am a person who's acting impulsively, sometimes, most of the time, especially if something's bothering me or keeping me up for most of the nights. And that's what CJ's death is doing to me those days. Not just because I know that she did not have had a deathly car accident but because I know that a highly regarded police officer commanded her death, highly regarded and dirty. Maybe he also - No, I don't wanna go there. The only thing that matters to me right now is to bring him to justice, at all cost. Even if it means that I don't come out of this in one piece, and that's most likely. I made a promise to CJ, I'll bring all the fuckers down who are responsible for her brother's death, and I'll bring all those down who are responsible for hers, and those who know me they know I'll stay true to my word. My eyes fall into the woman I love more than my own life and I clench my jaw to withhold a heavy sigh. I still can't believe that someone like me deserves someone like Maura. She's everything I am not, and that she's keeping up with me. I furrow my eyebrows as I trace her bare her naked soft shoulder and she sighs. God, I hope I am not about to wake her up now, I will do anything but that. I want to keep her safe and I want to put an end to this damn charade, for Maura, my family and friends, and for CJ, so I have to bite the bullet now. Easier said than done, though. I swallow hard and let my fingertips run over her neck and frown. "I know that you will hate this, but I have to do it, Maura." I whisper and she's sighing. "I know you're going to hate me at the end and won't forgive me for putting you through this, and that I didn't wake you even though I knew that this might be our last night together." I stop and swallow hard because even for me that thought is hard, almost unbearable because I am about to break the most important promise I'm about to break. A promise I've given to Maura. That I'll be always be there for her, with her, until our last days on Earth. That we'll spend our evenings of life together and that I'm going to protect her at any cost. A promise that Maura and I are going to a start a family of our own after this damn case is over. We talked about it in passing, like we've been taking about the weather or the latest local news. Maura asked me what I am thinking about children and I had shrugged and answered that I'd love to have a bunch of kids some day, when our lives get slow again before I paid special attention to my beer and burger. That was it, that little talk sealed the deal. Sure, the topic came up again every now and then, but both of us had been a thousand percent sure that we'll try it after the undercover operation ended. Well, I will end it now and I am beyond sure that I won't be there to see the closure. I heave a sigh and kiss her bare shoulder gently with a frown before I whisper into my sleeping wife's ear. "The day you bumped into me was the best day of my life, Maura. Even though we started off with a lie. I ... I thought I would know what love is but since you're a part of my life you taught me better. I have been thinking that I already had met the love of my life that you have been proven that I have been wrong because you ran into me," I have to smile at that memory and kiss her ear. "literally, and in that moment I was falling for you madly. Maura, I'm still falling for you every day, every sinlge time you come up with a fun fact." She's stirring and I'm hoping that she won't open those eyes I love so much. Why I'm hoping she won't wake up? Because I know that she'll see right through me and my plans, and that she'll trying to talk me out of this, successfully. I keep my mouth for a couple of seconds shut and am beyond grateful that she doesn't move anymore even though the voice in the back of my head is telling me that Maura's conscious. I lick my lips and continue because I have to get this off my chest before I leave our bed for the very last time. I need her to know that I will always be there. "When we fought, I said some terrible things and I hope that you know that I meant none of those words. I hope that you know that I never regret that I met you and that don't regret that we got married. I don't even know why I said such things. But sometimes you get the best out of me, and the worst. I want you to know that I'm doing this for you and for Ma. Frost and Korsak, and maybe even Frankie." Her shoulders are shaking and I pause. "I want you to know that I'm putting this to an end to keep you safe, Maura." My prayers go unheard because she turn onto her back and my heart skips a beat as soon as I see tears streaming down her face.

My eyes flutter shut when she's tracing my face with her fingertips. It might be the last time I feel her skin on mine but it won't stop me.

"Please stay in bed with me." Maura whispers hoarsely and I almost give in. "Only one more night. Please."

I don't answer right away, I try to resist the urge to pull the cover high over us again and to forget my next steps. And I force myself to keep my eyes open while Maura's running her hand down my neck and my collar bone. It seems like she's trying to memorize who my skin is feeling when it's still warm. Then she's running her thumb gently over my lips and I don't mind that at all. On the contrary. I lower my head and press them gently on hers. The kiss isn't asking for something more, it's just to comfort each other, to tell Maura that I love Maura and that there's nothing to be afraid of. But it's also mixed with the fear of our final goodbye. I pull slightly away and try the tear on my wife's cheek with my thumb. "Maura, I love you so much and that's why I have to do this." I whisper. "You won't be safe if I don't."

Maura's closing her eyes and nods. "I know. Just promise me that you'll be back after -"

I can't and I won't promise that, that's why cut her off immediately. "No matter what will happen, you won't be alone. There's still Ma and Frankie, Tommy, Kors -"

"But neither of them is you." She cuts me short now and I furrow my eyebrows. "Maybe I have them all after - but the only one I want to have is you, Jane. I want you to promise me that you'll come back home in one piece."

In one piece, maybe that's possible but probablyy not the way she means it. I lick my lips and sigh heavily, kissing her once more. Sweet and gentle. "You know I can't promise you that." I reply truthfully and I hate myself for that as soon as I see the pain written all over her face, and in her eyes. I place her hand over my heart and frown. "I want you to know that I love you from the bottom of my heart and that I'd do everything to keep you safe, Maura. I'd even die for you. And no matter what, I'll be always watching over you. That I promise you."

Maura's closing her eyes and I can tell that she's swallowing down a heartbreaking sob. "I love you too, Jane." She croaked.

I don't want to spin this out and sit up. "I ... should go." I mean it but can't make myself getting out of the bed, especially when I feel my wife's fringers wrapping around my wrist. I frown deeply but I don't dare to look at Maura. "Maura -"

"You are the love of my life too, Jane. I want you to know that, too."

Those words doesn't make it any less hard to leave the bed now only to sacrifice myself for the greater good, but it's necessary. I swallow down the lump in my throat but don't dare to look at her, at least I know that this feeling isn't one-sided. I nod to myself because now I'm more determined to put all of this to an end than ever. I take a deep breath and kiss Maura one more time, saying, "Everything's gonna be okay, I promise." Then I get out of our bed without giving my wife the chance to respond.

After I have showered I get dressed without saying a word. It's time to slip into my undercover role for one last time. I put my hair in a ponytail but leave my wedding band on my finger this time. At least I want to keep a little part of the real me with me. Then I do something very unusual. I get my badge from my nightstand and hand it to Maura after I sat down on the bed. I don't say a word but kiss her one last time. Passionately because I know we won't have another chance to do so. She's responding to the kiss and tangle her fingers in my hair, but then she pulls back and puts her forehead against mine, and I let her do so. I need it as well, to take it as a encouragement. We stare into each other's eyes like we're trying to tell each other things that we can't put into words and it's working. I sigh and get up to my feed, leaving the bedroom without a word. I hesitate after I closed the door behind me and hear a shattering sob that's coming from Maura. I know that it sounds cold-hearted but I've never been good when it came to farewell. I am surprised that Maura didn't ask if I won't take my gun with me. I'm sure that it's best for her and for the rest of my family and friends that I didn't to let them in on my plan.


End file.
